~MeMoRiEs of mE~

Visits from time to time..

2010-12-23T21:54:00.002+08:00

I realized over the past week why visits are important, especially when they're from people whom you don't get to see very often.

They bring a new perspective into things in your life that you've been so absorbed in and sometimes what they see from that different angle can be really important.

No wonder there's so many diplomats visiting here and there.

I was called in for a talk, about something that i guess was subconscious there, but was suppressed because of how things have been for awhile.

It revealed to me the hurt of a person close to me. It connected me to a point of view that I should have seen from but didn't.

Little did I know that I was actually the pivot in which a decision balanced on.

Now that options were presented, a choice has to be made soon. Else the quiet suffering continues.

It's difficult because I'm in the middle of it, because I don't want to cause too much hurt to either sides.

I always thought that it was their business to close things up, but I didn't know that I had an indirect stake in it.

Bottom line... things need to be done.

P.S: Hi Nicky =)

2009-10-04T15:28:00.001+08:00

'Lau Yi' 2006 CNY

'Lau Ma' 2006 CNY

'Lau Ma' 2007 CNY

'Lau Yi' 2007 CNY

I snapped these shots during CNY a few years back, when there were still people coming to my house to bai fang and stuff. I think i only have so many of their photos.

I grew up in their company and care. I really don't think words can describe how much i owe to them for my upbringing. My Lau Ma litterally spoonfed me when i was young, washed all my clothes and provided me breakfast, lunch and dinner. When i was bored i played cards with my lau yi, who taught me how to play blackjack and stuff like that. (haha)

Likewise, as i got older (like, secondary - jc old), my Lau Ma still woke up at 5.45am everyday to prepare a simple cup of milo and two slices of bread with butter before i left the house. She still continued to wash my clothes for me, and kept the house tidy and neat everyday.

how old are they now? Mmmm. 96 and 91? I think so.

For me, looking at them puts a smile on my face, because i don't get to see them everyday now.
They're staying at a home and I visit them once every weekend. Now I'm the one who buys them food and try to make them happy just for that near one-hour of visit.

No, not many visit them anymore and i doubt they even have a great care. But definitely not me, cos i just owe to much to them and love them to much to just let them go.

it's coming!

2009-09-28T13:23:00.004+08:00

something to make you smile is coming......

re-visit on the.... 3rd oct 2009!

2009-06-16T13:49:00.002+08:00

I think for some of us, after finishing our A levels and somehow spent the last six months doing whatever we have been doing, we have arrived at such a time that we suddenly look back and reflect on what we've been doing all these while.

Not that we don't look back at other times, but it's just that this time, we've a significantly longer break till what happens to us next as compared to previous times. So long that in this period of time, we may have already cultivated a totally different lifestyle from the school-going us of the past.

It used to be, for most of our lives, a routine school day, 5 days a week, with the anticipated weekends and school breaks. You study the crap outta yourself during school, fall asleep during lectures, trying to finish unfinished homework last minute, hoping not to get screwed for handing in incomplete or half done work. Then after the mind busting HALF day of school you come to the next half of CCA that wears you out even more physically, (unless of course you're in like chess or robotics or those stuffs).

At the end of the day you feel so shagged out that you just wanna go home, eat and sleep - not forgetting the couple of hours on the internet or games between dinner and sleeping. Maybe there'll even be time to squeeze in homework time. Haha.

I bet you're thinking along the lines of : 'Those were the times.'

I remember how i wished school to end, to not have to wake up every morning needing to get to school before i'm late, how i wished to be able to do what i want and not just work my brains out for some piece of paper with a specific letter 'A'.

But I sort of miss the other stuff that comes with that crap.
Expeditions, sitting at the canteen, the friday night dinners, School holidays.

But the only constant in life is ironically change. Opportunities come and go, friends come and go (some will stay, those are the ones you gotta hold on to with whatever sincerity and trust you have). Your environment changes: The singapore you were living in, the people you mixed with, may have to change. You're mostly no longer a teenager, you're going through the transition into adult life.

OMG, it sounds like one of the articles talking about the transitional phase from teen to adult in one of the exams.

My friends, the past is the past. Sounds sad aint it. However much you wished it to come back, it will never.

BUT.

The past can offer us some help. Yes, you must never, never forget what you started out and wished for in the past. Many times, we get so caught up in the moment, that we loose our forus of where we're heading in life. The values that we learnt, the goals that we set out for ourselves, the unbreakable spirit and determination that we had burning inside us when we were younger.

It's no doubt that we will be swayed from what we wanted, but we can always redirect ourselves the right way again.

2009-04-11T09:31:00.001+08:00

Hi blog.

You're gonna be more abandoned now.

But it's okay.

I'll still visit sometimes. haha.

Hello you unexpected visitor who asks me to update but i said i have nothing i wish to update here about.

yes, YOU nicky. haha.

2009-04-11T00:20:00.002+08:00

Don't be too sad. =)

My thumbdrive still with you! go look at what's inside!

And look forward to a new chapter each week!

see you soooon =)

2009-02-21T14:31:00.002+08:00

11.16 for 2.4?!

Omg. someone please take a whip and make me run. (jerome excluded from this offer)

Go batch 11! Raise batch 12 up well! =)

And I believe that this coming march xp.... will be heavy. On the heart.

Who needs tissues in the rainforest?

'I like to walk in the rain because no one will know when i cry' or something like that, idea is there.

BEARS for charity!

2009-02-11T12:21:00.002+08:00

HELLO PEOPLE!

I'm selling Hand-sized bears for charity!

it's a great gift for valentines / future mother's day gift!

It's a brown bear holding a pocket of flowers!

Only $20!

Comon, do the disabled a favor.

Due to the reccession, alot of them have been retrenched and sought this charity organization for jobs. But the organization itself is also short of monehh because their fundings are being cut too. So they are making and selling these bears to sustain themselves.

SO BUY! GET YOUR FRIENDS TO BUY AND THEIR FRIENDS TO BUY TOO!!

Call me for one k! You all know my number.

Even before i had the chance to reject this.

2009-01-21T11:37:00.003+08:00

(this has been sitting in my drafts for rather long)

A.Each tagged person must write 8 things about themselves on their blogs.
B.At the end, choose and tag 8 people. o.O

Tagged by Rome

Seriously... whoever who started this....

1. I have a reason to believe that i live more for the peole around me than for myself. I gather a sense of purpoes in doing what i do because there are those around me whom what i do would have an impact on. Then again, that may be some self centered way of thinking cos it seems like i only do things that i get appreciated for, although i don't deny that knowing that people appreciate what i do gives me more motivation.

conclusion: I may be feeding my own ego through others.

2. I think i lack the curiosity to learn more about stuff. (Oh no, mega diasppointment to ODAC). If without a reason, I don't think I would bring myself out of my house to say.... go to the library to look for books to read. And while I am on the internet almost the whole day if i nothing else that require my attention, I do not go check out what's happening in the world or stuff like that. However, if there is something that REQUIRES me to learn, especially something other than the textbook kind of learning, (eg, astro and first aid etc) OMG, i can do it for hours. =)

conclusion: I is NOT proactive, but is ENTHU. (Fail as leader, succeed as worker)

3. Being the only child at home, being at home is naturally boring. Therefore ever since young, i have been out of my house, and in other people's house playing with friends. I believe i started playing at my neighbours house when i was 5, moved on to the neighbour one level above me, (and eating dinner there), to a schoolmate in primary school who's my best friend on the 9th floor, (i was on the 12th). Even after i shifted to Yishun in primary 2, i continued to go back to my old house to play. I think that's the foundation to why i place my friends in such high priority and treasure them so much. I did not have a sibling to share things with, my parents are working most of the day, and i can't possibly continue to play with my great grandma can i?

conclusion: I am deprived of a wholesome family and seek enjoyment and comfort elsewhere. (That sounds worrying) O.o

can I continue this some other time? Hahaha.

2009-01-16T13:55:00.002+08:00

Inner conflict can sometimes be really irritating.

It's alright to get angry. But it's better to forgive.
It's alright to feel neglected. But it's better to be understanding.
It's alright to want more. But it's better to feel contended.

Ladilaaadadida.

How come I can't find the person to talk to suddenly?
Maybe because a change in topic requires a change in the party too?
????????

2009-01-14T09:46:00.003+08:00

Sometimes,
we seek very hard to find an answer to our questions,
a solution to our problems,
a formula to happiness.
Yet, when we finally do find it,
we realize that it's just a door that opens to many other doors.
It seems never ending.
Wth?!

2008-12-21T22:32:00.002+08:00

*removes cobwebs*

errr. hello blog, and people out there.

CHRISTMAS IS COMING

Yay. =)

P.S: Who's free/lonely/has nothing to do on New Year's Eve?

2008-11-26T21:08:00.001+08:00

You're my flurry of emotions.

A little something from my old blog

2008-11-02T12:38:00.000+08:00

Change is something tt everyone will face reluctantly, even if it's for the better. Coz there's always things you can't leave behind...But there's alwaes things to take comfort in...like the fact tt u may b making beter frens? Or during these times u can c if yer frens really treat u as a real fren. Will they look u up even though it mayb inconvienient for them to? True frens walk in whn the rest of the world walks out.

-binni

M.C

2008-09-23T23:08:00.002+08:00

My results for Prelims

GP: 40.5
Math: 45
Physics: 41
Econs: 37
Lit: 49.3, maybe 50.

SEEUE/D

Woots, that sucks. Yes it does. Join my newly formed Miracle Club. Or M.C.

"We turn 'U's to 'A's"

And I'm serious. I'M FRIGGIN SERIOUS ABOUT SCORING As.

I APPRECIATE IT IF YOU DON'T LAUGH.

IF YOU THINK I CAN'T DO IT,

PISS OFF

BECAUSE I'LL DO MY DAMNED BEST TO PROVE YOU WRONG.

IF YOU THINK I CAN THEN WORK WITH ME AND WE'LL MAKE IT THERE TOGETHER.
While many may despair, feel dejected, or are feeling the 'I might as well give up now' mood,

I CHOOSE not to.

Because I don't want these two years to be a waste.
Because I don't want to disappoint the people who believe in me.
Because I don't want to make the worries of those who care about my future come true.
Because I don't want to put everything I've learned in ODAC to shame by giving up.
Because I don't want the blame to go to ODAC.
Because I don't want to let myself cry when I step out of the exam.
Because I have responsibilities and reputations to live up to.
Because I have an ambition I don't want to give up.
Because my ambition is more than just for myself.
Because I am the only child of my parents.

I don't know how to pen a motivational speech nor tell inspiring tales.
But what I do have, and I really hope you feel my sincere feeling, that I wish you all not to give up, or I would be really sad.

Because if you do,

You will be sad.
The people around you will be sad.
Your parents, your teachers, your friends.
People whom your life currently revolves around.

If you love them, you should know how much you DON"T want them to be sad. If you know you don't want them to be sad, you should know what you have to do now, and not continue to dwell in your self-induced helplessness.

Don't give up now, I feel that it's selfish in a way. I know it hurts, especially if you've studied. I know you might feel helpless if you may not be inclined academically.

But I believe that something can be done, always. To do that something, is a CHOICE.

I'm really sorry if it may sound harsh. But I'm really feeling very sad hearing how much people are starting to want to give up.

DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UPDON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UPDON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP DON'T GIVE UP!

Or I may just cry, especially if you mean a lot to me.

2008-09-21T22:37:00.002+08:00

I went for evening mass today, without having to rush! Usually I'd drag myself out of the house late, and end up having to jog a little into church to be just a little bit early. The result is a semi-wet me.

However, not today! Today I was 20 mins early! The rosary session was still going on when I stepped in. I prayed for awhile, and then battled to keep awake.

I came upon a sudden realization today at mass. I don't know how, I don't know why. But it just happened. I was looking at how my life was going right now, how my results sucks, how I keep falling asleep in class despite sleeping about 6.5-7hrs the night before, without having any exercise,
how I've become so easily irritated and distracted by stuff.

Then I compared it to how I was before, in Secondary school. Yes, my results MAY have not been that good, but I wasn't failing exams and tests, nor do I remember constantly sleeping. I was instead, chatting very often with my sitting partner and occasionally being scolded by my chinese teacher for doing so. (She taught me for all four years)

Naturally I wondered what has led to this change, how come I've become so... broken. Somehow, I found the answer at mass today. It may just be what I've needed to salvage this messed up situation, and drive home a few As for As.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Since when did the want become a need?
Or perhaps it may just be a deep, deep want.
How did I let myself get so attached?
To think that without you I'd be a wretch.

I feel I lost my strength,
By slowly giving it to you freely.
But right now I need it back,
And it has not been easy to retrieve it.
Not so because you don't want to let go,
More so I don't want to stop giving.

Yet today I finally realize,
And I'll stand on my own to feet again.
So that the future might be brighter,
And my heart so much lighter.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

My er-yi (mum's younger sis) came back from Norway today to visit, and attend my Jiu Jiu's (Mum's younger bro) wedding on the 4th of October. Brought along my counsin too.
So I just returned from my Grandma's place. (I don't think I've been there for more than a year now).

On the way back, we saw the new Fedex advertisement. The one involving two collies.(ZOOOOOOMMMMGGGGGGGGG CCCUUUUUUUTTTTTTEEEEEEEEXXXXXXXXXX)

*Ahem*

And she said, 'Fedex and UPS cannot merge. Because if they do, they'd get FedUP.'

HURHUR.

Today was a good day. =)

2008-09-20T16:14:00.002+08:00

Sorry for the long gaps in between by posts. But sometimes when I wanna start posting something, I end up not completing it because it's just too much to type, and not everything is of such importance that if i don't put it down the world will die or something.

BUT. There ARE some things that I'd like to post here. Hopefully it'll be some sort of advertisements for the people who are trying to hard to save the planet of ours.

I've been watching some videos on Nat Geog online (since i don't have SCV now T.T), and no matter how many times I hear about our world is being polluted, temperatures are rising, wildlife is dying, glaciers are melting etc, it always ends up in me feeling really really heart broken.

The fact that the way we live is consuming. The fact that our wants are never satisfied. We're supposed to be the most intelligent race alive, but we're somehow not clever enough to understand that scarcity is a problem that we have to keep to a minimum.

I mean, okay, scarcity = unlimited wants, limited resource. The stupid things is that we just accept that fact, and continue on to pursue 'growth' for a 'better life'. Oh, life's gonna be just GREAT in about 50 years time. (I think that can be added to your 'i don't want to see myself grow old, so i'll die' reason leh shu xian).

The other thing that got me really shaken up was last wednesday when i was watching earth from above on central, where they showed live clubbing of seals. It was a really... graphic sight. Seals all lined up after being clubbed with one or two of them occasionally twitching from pulses of pain.

I was thinking, 'Here I am, watching this.' WATCHING. Unable to do anything.

Helplessness.

It kinda sucked, that feeling.

All the seals had, was ONE, O-N-E guy, travelling to the ROCK they lived on, almost everyday, to take care of them.

Well, if you've got time or wanna relax abit, go www.nationalgeographic.com and watch the videos. Some of them are quite interesting and funny (the animal ones). But others like the climate ones are really worrying.

That's all for now. =)

If you think you're life's bad.
There's always someone worst off than you.

2008-09-09T22:41:00.001+08:00

While this blog undergoes it's periodical low level of activity, please feel free to continue conversations on the tag board which is always available
(unless cbox has a problem with their sever).

We (I) apologize for the lack of updates of my life because you who read this probably know most of it.

For you who aren't in the immediate 'know-what-is-going-on-in-his-life', we humbly seek your forgiveness.

I heard this on Class 95 today.
Brought a smile to my face ont he train.
People must've thought i'm weird.
*Female in romantic tone*
'So what if your hair is dropping and you're balding?'
'You're still ugly'

*Peace*

Want to play a game?

2008-08-22T00:09:00.002+08:00

Here's something to make the tag board a little less dead. Though i really do not know what kind of rsponse it'll get.

Rules and Regulations (please read before participating)

Everyday, you're allowed to tag two non-consecutive sentences on the tag board to follow on the story, and we'll see what kinda whacked up shit happens. How about that?
Any characters may be involved, discreet and use of profanities if any, though highly discouraged. Can be about any topic, logical or not, fantasy or not.
Keep it... moderately clean.
No language use that may incurr any racial, religious, gender etc offence.

Type wisely. No spamming.

Game ends 30th August. Haha.

I'll start... obviously.

~The story goes~
One day, Rod wakes up.

NDP 08

2008-08-10T00:22:00.002+08:00

It usually doesn't rain on National Day.
It almost did though, today. But the clouds somehow managed to hold their pee in. Hooray!
I think this year's airshow was one of the longest that i've seen. Okay fine, I haven't been watching NDP for the past three years or so. But today's one was really great!
Oh no... I'm starting to ponder about what my uncle told me. 'You only get one chance of flying a combat aircraft and that's in the army!'. :S
But I wanna try to get into SIA asap if I can!

Anyways, fireworks were half good half sad. Good because initially they were really awesome. (as usual) But after awhile the smoke from all the fireworks kind of covered out the later ones, and we couldn't really see the full thing. Oh well.

But it's the after parade activities that were whoresome. Ahem.
Frisbee! Big field = can throw freely. (minus the many many people that left) :D
Dance dance to funny music, form human structures, and do crazy things for photos. *Cough* dorvile, photos. *cough*. I had a superman photo, and one mid air one i thinks!?

Yes, very fun time since quite long time. Go high a bit bit.
So anyway, it's back to studying for now. And Sam says she's addicted to studying. :|

Yay for National Day!

2008-07-28T21:53:00.002+08:00

Patience - virtues of virtues.
Why does something that's so good,
Teaches itself with such hellish pain.
It's alright, it's human, I should be glad I am able to feel!
This feeling it really does hurt.
I want to let go, I must try harder.
The harder I try, the harder it gets!
Tears tears, laugh laugh, smile.
Never really understood how that's possible.

I think you read, so I'll tell you.
You're really special, I was asked why,
I didn't know the answer in words,
My eyes did well to show though.
What does He tell me? I guessed patience.
I was helped to realize, and now I know,
I know I'm lucky, I really do.
A person like that not many will have.
So thank you very much.
I'll try my best, it's not easy.
Everyday I'll find a new reason to smile.

Whee~~~the books are calling.
Wooo~~~the fishbish's are flying.

2008-07-10T00:04:00.001+08:00

Hoho, Kop from shu xian's blog again.

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to those who are unbridled, untrammeled, and free.

In love, you feel the most alive when things are straight-forward, and you're told that you're loved.

You'd like to your lover to think you are loyal and faithful... that you'll never change.

You would be forced to break up with someone who was ruthless, cold-blooded, and sarcastic.

Your ideal relationship is open. Both of you can talk about everything... no secrets.

Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.

You think of marriage as something precious. You'll treasure marriage and treat it as sacred.

In this moment, you think of love as something you thirst for. You'll do anything for love, but you won't fall for it easily.

What Are The Keys To Your Heart?

2008-07-09T22:41:00.002+08:00

S|USE|D

GP:43
Math:17
Physics:41
Econs:48
Lit:53

well... I'm just gonna have to work on it harder.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Second Nature.
I never thought of it that way until.... a few days ago.
Always felt right, felt natural.
Until I realized I was stabbing myself here and there. (not literal, literary-ly)
Resist! Resist!
It's as good as a temptation.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Frisbee competition! 27th July.
Not as fit as before, can't last as long as before in the game, nor throw as nicely as before. Ahhh. It's saddening. Even a 10:30 2.4km makes me feel like crap after the run.

it's kinda tough having to give up getting totally shagged and transfer that energy into studying instead. I tell you, there's.... factor immobility! Hence it's not efficient.
Opportunity cost incurred while shifting resources (energy) from exercising to studying.

But anyway, fishbish rocks. :D

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Lil girl, why do you look so sad and lonely when no one's around?
Though with others you look so perfectly fine.
I can't help thinking there's something wrong.
Maybe, turns out I'm better gone.

O give it back to me if you don't care,
Give it back to me so I'll be there-
For others who needs it more,
For myself who feels the sore.

My heart yearns to share, to bear,
But all I feel is the tear.

-

If gibberish above.
Then pardon the over-thought.
Else,
Then...
Try...
Try to understand.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Oh, and uh, happiness is a daily choice.

2008-07-08T20:41:00.001+08:00

Stop giving yourself to others so easily.
It's hard to reel you back.

2008-07-03T23:40:00.002+08:00

Willing heart.
The limitless passion.
Patient ears.
An enduring sincerity.
Sensitive lips.
Right place, right time.
Gentle touch.
When you need it most.

2008-06-30T22:38:00.001+08:00

You Are An ISFP

The Artist

You are a gifted artist or musician (though your talents may be dormant right now).

You enjoy spending your free time in nature, and you are good with animals and children.

Simply put, you enjoy beauty in all its forms and live for the simple pleasures in life.

Gentle, sensitive, and compassionate - you are good at recognizing people's unspoken needs.

In love, you are quiet and sweet yet very passionate. You love easily.

You have an underlying love for all living things, and it's easy for you to accept someone into your heart.

At work, you do best in an unconventional position. You express yourself well and can work with almost anyone.

You would make a good veterinarian, pediatrician, or composer.

How you see yourself: Sympathetic, kind, and communicative

When other people don't get you, they see you as: Incompetent, insecure, and overly sensitive

What's Your Personality Type?

Koped from Shu Xian's blog.

Er, well, if you compare this with the previous one... there's something wrong!

'Gifted artist or musician' - CRAZY ARH. I can't play instruments to save my life, nor can I draw!

2008-06-19T22:42:00.002+08:00

...And right now, I don't even know where it's going.
It's weird I tell you, how this thing even came about.
Definitely a problem with communication.
Definitely misunderstanding.
Why the different treatment?
Even though the reason's clear, why is there no sympathy?
So now it's a nuisance?
Oh man, I better start showing the right signs before things get more messed up.
Being taken away! How do I live without you...
It'll be so different.
It hurts to even be around.
Always reminded of the issues that exists.
And everyone's not helping, making things worse.
I'm doing what I can, but there's so much more, that I dare not.
I don't know how.
Expectations, hopes, morally right choices, self-centered desire.
Nope, not ready.
Yup, laugh, be happy, but, wrong person?
If it boils down to it, I'm being selfish, I think?

Okay, that was messed up.

Hopefully, I won't understand what I wrote in the near future.

Mid Years!

10 quirky facts about kissing

2008-06-19T20:15:00.003+08:00

By Laura Schaefer

Think you know a thing or two about kissing? You probably do. But the facts below are so off the beaten path, we’ll bet you don’t know them all—and they could come in handy. Not only could they provide some steamy “Did you know…?” chit chat, but they’ll help you see all the benefits a satisfying lip lock can bring into your life. Happy smooching!

1. Two out of every three couples turn their heads to the right when they kiss.

2. A simple peck uses two muscles; a passionate kiss, on the other hand, uses all 34 muscles in your face. Now that’s a rigorous workout!

3. Like fingerprints or snowflakes, no two lip impressions are alike.

4. Kissing is good for what ails you. Research shows that the act of smooching improves our skin, helps circulation, prevents tooth decay, and can even relieve headaches.

5. The average person spends 336 hours of his or her life kissing.

6. Ever wonder how an “X” came to represent a kiss? Starting in the Middle Ages, people who could not read used an X as a signature. They would kiss this mark as a sign of sincerity. Eventually, the X came to represent the kiss itself.

7. Talk about a rush! Kissing releases the same neurotransmitters in our brains as parachuting, bungee jumping, and running.

8. The average woman kisses 29 men before she gets married.

9. Men who kiss their partners before leaving for work average higher incomes than those who don’t.

10. The longest kiss in movie history was between Jane Wyman and Regis Tommey in the 1941 film, You’re in the Army Now. It lasted 3 minutes and 5 seconds. So if you’ve beaten that record, it’s time to celebrate!

Laura Schaefer is the author of Man with Farm Seeks Woman with Tractor: The Best and Worst Personal Ads of All Time.

Article courtesy of Happen magazine, www.happenmag.com.

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Yup, stuff msn posts on their frontpage when they run out of real news.

2008-06-03T19:59:00.001+08:00

how do you decide between the two?

MyPersonality.info Badge

2008-05-29T22:03:00.001+08:00

2008-05-29T14:37:00.002+08:00

'Ouch' and act that it doesn't hurt.
It's not easy when you've got your own reasons.
And it's not like people don't make mistakes.
And it doesn't feel good to have them repeated over and over again.

Can't the world be nicer?
The paradox of Peer pressure.

Anyways, I was reminded of why the June XP planning this time round feels like November XP planning.
Hopefully when we're really not around anymore, they'd be able to take Mr Lim far.
The questions on the board looks good, but they're worth nothing if they're not answered with knowledge. From yesterday, it seems quite lacking.
Need to improve on presentation skills.
Logistics dept doesn't seem ready yet. Very worrying. I don't feel like dying, yet. Nor do i want to see anyone die during this xp. Training will start soon.
Lisa has to get the heck outta the mountain on day 3.
There'll be no more snacking along the day. Only Breakfast, Lunch and Dinner.
Endure, and enjoy.
=)

Hoho, just blog hopped to the J1s' blogs.

NS medical check up tmr.

Training should be fun. =)

Six of the Most Fattening Ice Cream Flavors

2008-05-26T20:49:00.001+08:00

http://www.newsweek.com/id/138230?GT1=43002

just some really random stuff.

CJC ODAC Batch X - JC2

2008-05-21T14:43:00.003+08:00

It's been... close to one and a half years.

2008-05-16T00:20:00.003+08:00

Heartful Tears
Most sincere are the tears that flow from the heart.
They encapsulate the purest of emotions.
Happiness, suffering, regret, gratitude, worry, anxiety, pain.
They definitely do not flow in vain.

The reunion of mother and child.
A burial at the cemetery.
The loss, of a family.
A break up, between You and Me.

Ashamed, one should never be,
for these tears are the innocence of the heart.
Innocence that we think we lose as we grow up,
yet, in truth resides deep within.

Whatever the reason it may be,
tears from thy heart,
beautiful art thee.

2008-05-12T23:08:00.002+08:00

Shu xian said she can go.
Kannan just said he probably can go.
Hong Taa say there's a chance to go.

I'm damn happy.

Left.... A couple more.

Yet, there are those who... have less difficulty in going, but... are not trying as hard.
I'm saddened, as XP head.

If any of you J1s do read this,
Leave no one behind in Singapore for your June XP.
You'll regret it, and they'll regret it.

What did i say at the start of the year?
'You all should strive to go for XP, because it's the climax of your ODAC journey. Puts into practice all that you've learnt. If you don't want to go, then don't join'.

=) XP starting to look real good. =)

2008-04-28T22:21:00.001+08:00

I would like to think of it as being sensitive.
But then maybe it's called being self-centered.

2008-04-22T22:22:00.002+08:00

(S)expressions.
Hah.
Hong Zhou.

2008-04-20T21:35:00.003+08:00

I now know it was a mistake,
What I did, too much.
And i didn't thought it was,
Not till recently.
Thank God I did,
Though it may be too late.
Of course I'm bothered by it,
Much so that,
Almost always i think of ways.
Knowing what needs to be done,
Especially since I'm the guy.
Unfortunately unfortunately,
People, place, phase,
Bind these all together.
Ultimately,
There's little chance,
Inappropriate time, space, atmosphere.
Decision though, is with me,
Others are just an excuse.
Not that I don't want to,
Telling you isn't easy.
Keeping it within,
Naturally would be the choice.
Outside it's unsafe,
Whether it'll be alright,
How would I know?
On the other hand,
What if it's just me?

Only I know, maybe some know, will you know?

2008-04-19T19:17:00.002+08:00

the past week... My knee got better, thanks to fastum gel and hot-cold water treatment. But then on thursday... I injured my elbow. Same injury as two years ago that screwed my javelin throwing. Fell during touch rugby during pe. Same sport, same fall, same injury. :(

Well... i can't play frisbee, with my right hand, for awhile now. Hope it'll be recovered by next week. The left hand's still working though. ;)

No, i'm not going to be injuring my limbs one by one till i've to play with my teeth. Heh.

I'm trying to recall other stuff that happened past week, it's kinda difficult nowadays, which his worrying, because it feels as though i'm just letting time slip by unnoticed, precious time. I'm just gonna shoot out stuff as it comes to my head. *not high level here, please* ^^.

Econs test! Was it this week? I think so. 25m question. Hmm. I didn't get to my main point, and i didn't complete it. Dang. And i studied too, just... not too good with how to go about the long question. After i finally planned it and written about 1/3 of what i wanted to write, Ms Fan went, '15 mins left'. --"

Hopefully... i pass? But thinking about it now, a pass isn't good enough... I'm supposed to be doing well for class tests now! Geez, it's not gonna be helping me to go for June XP i reckon.

Which reminds me, there's math test next wed on vectors and complex numbers. Better not screw that one up.

Hmm... Monday's extra math care lesson with Mr Foo was canceled cos he had to go for a surgery. It's... the second time he's canceled lesson with me, out of two times. Haha, yes, means my Math remedial hasn't officially started. Heh, hopefully i'll be in time for mid years. Math lessons have become very interesting, and I listen alot more now. It's the teacher i tell you. Mr Foo's a great teacher. I strongly believe that if he were to teach the band 1 people, they'd surely get A*s for their exams, cos he has his own method of teaching, differing from common lecture notes-following lecturers. And he makes the conepts easy to learn as well as solve them through a little more cheem but makes questions easier methods. Haha. I dunno if you got what i mean, but nvm.

Somehow, I've also become more keen on econs. Perhaps it's because we're learning about the Macro-eoconomy now, which isn't as content based as micro econs. I find it more.. .relevant to the current world, like what we're learning can actually be applied to understand why the inflation rate and all are rising now. It's really interesting.

So, i don't sleep in these lectures or tutorials anymore. Unless... i sleep after 1130 the previous night, then maybe i do doze off for a few minutes. BUT! for the majority of it, i'm alert.

I can't say the same for physics though. I don't know, the lecturers are... kinda... I dunno how to describe, 'doesn't make the lecutre interesting enough?' I mean, the videos are nice to watch, but other than that, the running through of slides in our lecture notes can be done by ourselves too you know? It's just like going there to listen someone read a story for you to fall asleep. Thus, fall asleep is what i do, sometimes.

Heh, talking about sleeping, Lit lessons are probably the worst - i don't even have a table in lit class! Trouble writing stuff, very uncomfortable. Even falling sleep's difficult, but i still do, uncomfortably... that's why i'm always drained out after lit class. :S

anyway, i just remembered what went on on wednesday! Haha. Sports heats! After more than a year, i threw a shotput. 5.45kg i believe. 11.07m! And i got third! AHhaa. Lucky me, just go throw for fun and got a biscuit.

Hmm, but it felt good going back to SJI, to see the school, and coach. Didn't get the chance to go to the staff room to find teachers, not that there are many of whom i would know left. It's changed back there, it really has. I guess, in the end, i would prefer my memory of the school to be of the time when i was there, with my friends and teachers. No doubt, 206 lives forever in me.

Forever in me... like ODAC. Haha. We had upper body training that day. Arms, abs, back. Hehhe. Dragon push-up! Woo. Didn't really do a nice one though. Haha. But gosh, my core's really weak. The 1 min bridge was actually QUITE tough for me. I heard prashan did a 7 min.

Hmm, friday. My class won inter-class handball! Haha. And i played in the first match, with my right arm injured. Lol. Yes, i caught and passed with my left arm, for awhile only la. 2nd match saw the 'twin reinforement'. then last match was the intervention by the two basketballers. Ownzed.

I've a feeling i'm neglecting ODAC matters. Hmm... I wonder if i am. Or is it just because I'm toning down on it. Anyway, it doesn't feel right. I better start tending to urgent matters properly and stop procrastinating. It's the last month... uh huh.. last month.
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I wonder if it's alright to leave this like that. I'd like to know though.

I'm not finding a substitute, i'm not, i'm not. If i were, I'm a bastard worthy of being condemned.
So for now, though there may be a spark, I'd like not to. Untill i can convince myself I'm not.
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Ecclesiasticus.

Chinese gardens!

2008-04-13T15:42:00.004+08:00

That's the Map.
Waaa!!! Look at the fish!
An attempt at 'coolness'.

It was my first time here. (Shut up all you people laughing).

I liked it's tranquility in the morning.
Sat by the side of White Rainbow bridge watching the fish in the river. Fed them sunflower seeds... enjoyed the morning.

2008-04-13T14:59:00.002+08:00

Mid years are in two and a half months left.
That means... about ten weeks.
Minus off a week for June XP. [Hopefully I will be allowed to go then]
So, 9 weeks.
GP, Physics, Math, Econs Lit.

'Need to start studying really hard'. I had that intention in me since a week or two ago. But... It's not exactly happening to full effect. My tutorials are still behind, and I'm still falling asleep in physics lectures. (Yes, JUST physics). But I'm adapting, slowly.

'slowly'. There's a big risk that 'slowly' isn't good enough. May be too late in the end. So how?

I hate it when I know what to do but lack the discipline to. It's one of the hardest thing to instill in yourself.

Forming a good habit is as difficult as breaking a bad habbit,conversely forming a bad habit is as easy as breaking a good one.

Heh, the irony.

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I've found out the reason why, or rather I've been told why.
It's quite a big sum. I thought he'd be smarter than to do that.
But... Perhaps I'm a cause too? Since I've been absent from home for so long.
However, I know You'll keep him in check.
I believe he isn't the kind.
I believe he'll repent, and not repeat the mistake.
I do not want to blame, nor fault.
But when I see her tears, who else can I push it to?
In the end, I believe that understanding, trust, and integrity will save the day.
Just that, these are the very qualities that are so hard to build up, yet so easy to break.

My world in Your hands, do with it what You will.
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Probably need to start growing up, and start being more sensitive to the larger picture.
In the recent past, probably, even though I told myself not to, I was thinking selfishly.
So... though sometimes it's hard, I'll try, try to think that I'm not the only one.

Enough has been said, I don't want it to be such an affecting factor now. I don't have the time.

So, I'll remember, 1C13.
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Smile, and the world will look better.

2008-04-05T22:56:00.006+08:00

Didn't think there'd be so little j2s at chalet.Wwhen sam mentioned it, i thought everyone would try to go.

I guess PTM had a big impact on that decision.

No wonder Mr Lim tried to persuade me away from continuing with it. Should've seen the bigger picture. But, i wouldn't say that it would've been better not to go, because things that went on there definitely had a positive impact. Just that... it's not a thorough enjoyment thing.

Luckily he suggested having a talk with the j1s. I don't know if the feedback i gave would really help them - it depends on them ultimately - but i tried. Hopefully that hour-plus wasn't a waste of their time.

Giving the talk reminding me of this time last year, as we were getting ready for June XP and ATC. How i started training my 10km to qualify to take part. Clearing that run during the early hours of LTC. Hah. Reminded me of Chamah rain, kinjiang falls, flies @ tempurong, raft and waterfall abseiling. Not that these memories were far from my mind, but yes, i recalled them more vividly this time.

Reminded me of my ideals... reminded me of reality.
It could have been better, might've been better.

I would certainly want to go experience them again, just that this time... the people would be different, and i'm sure the experience and memories would differ greatly from the time i went with my batch.

It's a... 'I want to', yet 'I'm hesitating cos...' thing. Similar with the Chalet I'd say.

Took photos! Oh how i love snapping dem camera away. Haha, have i got a story to cook up with the pics i gathered. Heh Heh. Be ready for the results of the master at work. Hint* jethro hong zhou.

Ordered too much food, or rather, too little people came. I seriously thought there would be at least 35 - 10 j2s, 25 j1s. So I asked sam to order enough for that. Obviously it was an over-estimate, and so much food went wasted. Sinful, sinful.

Melting Marshmellows! Yum Yum. Long stay stick definitely works better.

The night was long, shiok, pain, vomit, sleep. Haha.
Whoa, first time. It looked very viscous, must be all the meat during

The 'i never' session wasn't that enjoyable, cos we knew too much already. Maybe next time we should just stick with kings - if there is a next time of course.

Some people escaped by drinking water, plain one.

But personally, i think it felt good.

Woke up to everyone around me either asleep or missing. Disturbed by some two, but thought it'd be fine. Had a series of door knocks, waking up to open/close the door.

Morning came, and I visited the j1s room!

Haha, the guys (except jia jian) were all k.o-ed since last night after the talk! Dang, it's only one night! Can't you guys last!? Judith, Jin shi, olivia and a few of the other girls were all awake.

Stuck prawn sticks into chong kai's foot and pasted stickers. Heh.

After which went frisbee with J1s, Jethro and Hong Zhou.

Haha, I hope they would enjoy frisbee as much as we did. Taught my team how to fake and run and a standard fast break.

Chong Kai's a pretty good deep. He runs there fast and can catch pretty well!

Judith blocked like 5 times!

And Sarah got the idea of getting herself free quite well.

Just that.... all need to practice throwing better. LOL.

Anyways, got back, everyone woke up, honey water and pack up.

Watermelon rocks right? It should be an essential for every chalet next time. Too bad the facilities at this one was so bad that we couldn't cut and freeze them properly.

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Many thanks to Sam for organizing it, and going through the admin stuff, as well as the food! Really sorry we couldn't finish it. But the 'cookies' were nice, and the drinks were... :D Haha.

Also, dorvile! Thank you for looking after us and doing all the extra work. I felt kinda slack back there, cos i know how it feels to do all these (usually i do them at my ex-class's chalet). But just want to let you know they're noticed and appreciated by me!

To my J2s who didn't go, you all were missed... Definitely would have been better with you all there.

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Some trouble at home. Sounds quite big. I don't know how it'll turn out. But if he's not going to talk, then yeah, probably the house'll go. And the two will go elsewhere too. I don't know how things will go. Hope You'll help.

It's like last time,
years back.
10 years back.
A similar thing.
I was young then,
I am not now.
But, my relationship with them,
I think it got stuck in the 'then'.

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The way I do things...
Are wrong sometimes.
Are weird sometimes.
Express the wrong intentions sometimes.

I guess really do suck at speaking.
Never was the one to be on stage.
Behind the curtain where the spotlight can't reach,
better suited a person like me.

I try my best,
My best may lead to anger,
My best may cause suffering,
My best may not be the best.

But still... I'll try.

Just that,
Whom do I call in the middle of the night now?
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I kinda hate the way you are now.

2008-04-02T22:15:00.001+08:00

mola mola

acinonyx jupatus

lvl 4 then toys?

2.4km <9mins

lvl - 1

Study hard, achieve more

2 months left.

2008-04-01T19:59:00.002+08:00

Maybe, I finally convinced myself that I need not care.

Oh Freedom, how sweet art thou.

2008-03-30T23:57:00.002+08:00

Awesome gunpla.

Awesome singlet.

Awesome underwear.

HAHA. Only those who know, know.

2008-03-23T18:22:00.004+08:00

March was seriously one heck of a month.

Started with saturday trip to malaysia to settle transport for march xp.
Next, N.V.M competition.
Common tests right after that.
During common test week - marking knowledge tests and preparing j1s.
Xp immediately on the sunday after CTs.
Long Rajah, Fast Datok, Cloudy Tioman, ZOMG Berkelah
Came back, long debrief.
X-Physique.

@@"||

Anyway, birthday was great this year. I got happy-birthday-ed again on the bus while i was quite blur (i think the cake then was an apollo), then again at f&s by a big chocolate cake shared by like, 5 ppl. Then another time at crystal jade, with yet another cake.. sarah lee! =)

I'm getting fat. haha.

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This is probably my most sinful Lent ever. "ve been caught up doing all the work as stated at the start of this entry that I've almost completely forgotten about Lent. Confessions, confessions... I haven't gone for it! And i only attended stations once.

Oh the penance.

Visited less churches this year with RCIY, St. Michael, St. Peter and Paul, St. Ignatius, St Mary's.
I was last to get sent home this time! Haha.

Someone was supposed to keep me company just in case i fell asleep but fell asleep herself!

Reached home @ 2.45am, slept at 3am.

Anyway, that was Maundy Thursday going on to Good Friday
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Supposed to attend service with Grandma, jan and mel @ 10:30 am. But i woke up at like, 10 totally tired (awake for 22 hrs the previous day, cycled to school, had PE). Brushed my teeth at 11:30, and went back to sleep.

Woke up 3 distinct times:

1) The usual garang guni man in the house talking to my mum. Wanted to sell the used tv set to him. But end up didn't.

2) My grandfather came, remember waking up, walking out, getting two ang pows for my birthday, and going back to sleep

3) A china garan guni man. My mum sold the tv set to him for 20 dollars. (i dunno why she didn't to the usual one even though he offered 20 too). Weird.

Really woke up at 3.45, showered and left the house for stations cum service.

Almost fainted from hunger during stations. (Very un-xp like. LOL), but i prevailed to the end!

All that tahan-ing for....... CARROT CAKE AND SARDINEPUFF from Old Chang Kee. Yum.

Then came home and ate er.... mixed rice, and late night donuts courtesy of mummy.

There ends Good Friday.
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Saturday! Met the Odacers @ prata house to let Kenneth happy happy abit before leaving for army.

We spent like $99.60 there. @@'||

And when i got there, they sat very retardedly.

Yes, all on one side of the table. 'Last supper' they said. *faint*

So in the end, it really wasn't feasible. Couldn't talk properly and stuff... so in the end..

Makes more sense now doesn't it? (oh, victoria took the picture by the way)

So after that i rushed over to Marese&Mel's place to help make cookies, but eh.. I arrived too late. :(

Aunty's noodles were yum yum. Soup also slurp slurp nice. (Don't think sick now people)

Oh, the usual thing happened. We left really late. I shan't say it again the next time, will just... go with the flow~~~~~

Easter Vigil mass! Though i must honestly admit I'm not close to the current batch that got baptised, but still, I'm happy for them. :D It was baptism + confirmation together this time.

After the whole mass ended, we headed down to town! Swensens yo! Gosh, Mel can drive now. It feels really weird, cos like.. i dunno, i never exactly had friends who could drive me around.

Anyways, ate chicken baked rice just for the sake of eating, wasn't exactly hungry, but definitely very full after that. Shared ice cream with mel and steph, and wooo, home.
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Easter Day spent @ home. Hmm... it was... nice to have time to put aside everything and just laze a bit again. But yes, i know. No more once this week starts.

[The flame... is somewhat dying. Probably exhaustion, probably disappointment. But still.. it's the last term. Chiong arh!!]

Come on people, smile!

Look on studies as a positive thing and it'll suddenly shine brighter.

Let's make good what's left of this year! And enjoy this shit outta it after A's.

2008-02-24T12:03:00.002+08:00

CTs are next next week!!!???

Okay, that's REALLY kinda close, and I haven't actually been studying too much. I wonder where all my time went? Probably those hours just slipped by in school during those measly one hour breaks where getting in and out of class already takes up 15 mins.

March XP's coming up! I'm definitely not like Ronald who expertly planned out the trip, but I hope that nothing major screws up. But much of it would really come to naught if the execution isn't good. Strange as it seems, i didn't think that last year's March XP was that screwed up, at that point of time. But looking back on it now, I kinda understand why Mr Lim said the things he did.

Anyway, I'm really hoping this year's would be good. Hope batch-11 would turn out good too. I mean, as much as I can, i would like to warn them about stuff that's to come, and prepare them as much as i can to handle it when it does indeed come.

I was just thinking about this the other day, that I only had a maximum of 4 months left in ODAC. I mean, for the past year I've devoted like what, 75% of my time to ODAC, and might have neglected several other aspects of my life. But I'm not regretting it at all. But the point is that what's gonna be left of me after I step down? Not that I'm saying my journey has ended or anything, cos there's always time in the future to meet up with the peeps and still do stuff together. But more so on how's life gonna be in school? The time after school that i Usually spend planning, talking, training. Are all those gonna be turned into study, study, and study? Scary thought. But nonetheless, i know it's inevitable that studying is going to take up the large portion of my time in the near future. So I'm just hoping that I would be able to 'connect and transfer'.

Yup.

....waiting for the day when i'm complete
without you i'm
doing what i can to let you be
making sure there's nothing showing on the outside
something's dying on the inside
i'm still broken but i'm free
i'll see you on the flipside.....

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Things to do next week:

1) Training for NVM
- Training schedule

2) CCCCCCCCCCC

3) Prepare for March XP
- Confirm No. of people going. [ Meet those who didn't turn up for briefing]
- Expedition Knowledge Lvl - o
- Get transport
- Prepare/know route for Berkelah
- Day leaders
- Department prep
- Finalize Itinerary
- Bring JC1s to Army Market
- Shopping list
- Show final plan to Mr Lim

4) NVM
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Next Next week

1) Common Tests
2) Training schedule
3) Final prep for XP
4) XP!!!!
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2008-01-30T23:04:00.000+08:00

Lvl - 0 cleared
Lvl - 0 18 rds cleared
Lvl - 0 21 rds??

2008-01-24T23:09:00.000+08:00

Today we cried.

Tomorrow we lift our heads.

When the time comes, we take pride in what we set out to acomplish.

2008-01-21T21:51:00.001+08:00

First Exco meeting today.

I think we're still starting out. I would REALLY HATE it if we started to quarrel and argue in the future. So don't. It's an order from the P.

Number 1 rule in Exco meetings: NO QUARRELING.

Anyway, I think that talking to Mr Lim and listening to what he has to say about ODAC and his aspirations for ODAC, I can't but wonder how much capacity he really has in him. Physically, Intellectually, Socially, he's an undoubted figure that i respect.

Like I was saying, talking to him about the plans for ODAC this year has made me look to alot of possibilities, so much so i was quite in a mess after him leaving and discussing further with Marcus.

For me, I'd really want to go for the expeditions that Mr Lim has drafted. But I don't want to go for them unless you all come for it also. That's why I was a bit straight with my words this afternoon, and I'm really sorry. I know that for myself, getting permission and all depends very much on myself to study and prepare myself, but I understand that for the majority of us it's not the case. I was abit self centered there, and I didn't mean any harm, hopefully it'll work out, maybe a miracle might happen and if we all study hard enough and show our parents that we can make it they'd let us go?

From Gareth's March XP msg last year, i gathered that their batch went through a tough time during their first three months in JC2. Though i see that it'll be difficult to avoid disagreements with one another, I just hope that they don't turn our friendships bad. I mean, it'll be really a waste it that happens. So... DON'T let that happen. Let's work it out fast, yet slow. Fast meaning not wasting time, slow when it's complicated.

For me, I realized the enormous amount of change and effort that has to be put in if i wanted to do all these stuff. And it's really a lot. Also, Mr Lim told me this during November xp last year, that he wishes batch 11 to be a good batch. That's why I'm going stricter on their commitment as well as other aspects. I wish for them to really appreciate the fact that they are in ODAC in the future, and really wish that they'd remember us and teach their juniors well. Batch 13* Heh.

So yes, let's work hard guys and girls!

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If I were strong enough,
I'd fly away.
Though tis a sanctuary,
A ship isn't built for the harbor.
So let the winds carry me forth,
To meet what the world has to offer.
I leave the comfort of the present,
to risk and seek a future with opportunities.

2008-01-15T23:44:00.000+08:00

According to Evadne, I'm must be damn emo.

Cos I'm pro in Lit. Means, can read well between the lines, means can feel the text, so means emo.

Haha! I was trying to stay awake during Lit today (i waited TWO whole hours for class) but couldn't. But when the teacher asked a question, 'So, how do you think the audience would feel about Othello after his final speech? Was he returned to his position before?' OR SOMETHING ALONG THAT LINE.

So i just said... 'They'd probably pity him, but the respect has been lost because he has done too much to degrade himself' OR SOMETHING ALONG THAT LINE.

And she saw it as such a cheem and well thought answer. Hahahah!

What can I can. I'm good. LOL.

Anyway, 1st training JC1s joining us for tmr. I wonder how many will turn up. How many will stay. Ah, i'm not entirely sure whether i'm supposed to keep them or not, and how to go about doing it.

There's just too much in my head to type out. (Actually can, but... it'll make me sound SUPERLY emo, so i won't).

Let's just hope everything goes alright. =)

Most important thing is to SMILE.

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When will the day come,
When the tides stop rising and falling,
When the sun fails to shine?

2008-01-10T21:42:00.000+08:00

Was afraid of forgetting, so i tried something. Didn't think it would be easy, and it wasn't. So poof!

Gone.

Hopefully I'll still remember some in time to come.

Anyway, Finally back to 'normal' school life. Still adjusting though, cos my body's totally not ready for odac. My mind isn't too, probably. Well, many things to do, and can't screw up studies this year.

Anyway, lots of stuff to do, and I keep forgetting when i try to consolidate them together.

My memory sucks, period. Any secret to better it?

Anyway, tmr's first official training i'm going for. I'm thinking it'd feel great to be back. Haha. So yeah, see you guys tmr!

If any of you who were under me for Orientation finds this blog,

It was great to have met you all. IG24 and 1T24. Really hope I help you all gel well enough to enjoy the time you have together.

IG24: It was only 3 short days, but I'm sure the memories of CJC was made better by this group of friends you had.

1t24: You have more time that IGs, but it'll be over before you know it, so really have fun, like EVERYDAY ok? But remember to do your homework la. Don't screw up your academics so early in the year. 1st intake stuff is important okay!!

Other than that, I'm a realllllly busyyyy person in school. (How i wished that were a lie). So here's apologizing in advance if i fail to be present for all your outings. =(

2008-01-02T01:08:00.000+08:00

New year.

Hmm. Resolutions? Too many. And I KNOW I'll forget them.

But just for the record:

Score well for A's.
Lead ODAC well.
Trust others more.
Judge others less.
Be a good cathechist

2007 was a good year. I can tell my life in the future has changed because of it.

What will 2008 bring? I guess I'll find out soon enough.

2007-12-23T02:42:00.000+08:00

one night, two parties.

Steph's:
It felt so familiar again, i guess THAT was the RCIY i belonged to.

Daniel's:
Lotsa food
foosball (survival champions: daniel and rod)
mahjong (yang's beginner luck)
cards (rod big time poker winner of fist round)
tv
noise
ping pong
presents (wa lau eh, no yang's reaction on tape).

7 wonders. (damn, shouldn't have remembered that, lol!)
Winner by MY decision: Marcus and Shu Xian.
Who's interested in gayism anyway? (jerome not included)

5 Tried to rape me. I won.
But my elbows hurt now la.

Longest hug winner: Daniel and Yang.
Wth, there weren't even any other competitors!
And they started the timing while no one cared. Cheat!

Ah, the fun. More to come, 206. Woo~~~

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Seconds tick, wind blows
Minutes pass, river flows.
Days continue, the sunlight glows.
Seasons change, the feeling grows?

~Randomness~

2007-12-21T00:52:00.000+08:00

Run, stone, orchard. Run, stone, orchard. Run, stone, orchard.

Orchard doesn't friggin have an OP shop. WTH!?

Anyways, my life doesn't seem as interesting this holiday, to non ODACers maybe, cos that's all i ever talk about nowadays. Gosh, I'm turning boring.

Oh well, what else can i say? I've been spending alot of time doing stuff related to it that I've almost blocked out all other activities that AREN't related to it.

I'll just put up my christmas line-up here.

21st - RCIY potluck @ Steph's, ODAC potluck @ daniel's.
23rd - stayover @ eugene with EAGLES ppl
23rd - 206 shopping, food-making,stayover
24th - midnight mass
25th - family, bbq @ joshua's @ night
26th - NOTHING?!
27th - Facil's training
28th - Facil's training2
29th - nothing again
30th - RCIY BBQ?
31st - Worry about school starting.

Happy holidays people!

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I don't know how to go about it.

2007-12-09T11:03:00.001+08:00

Just one more jamboree and I'm finally done. :)

2007-11-10T23:57:00.000+08:00

I need someone who understands the present me.

2007-11-04T23:51:00.000+08:00

When I look to my sides, I see no one.
When I look back, I see everyone.
When I look ahead, I see uncertainty.
When I look up, I fall into my own serenity.
When I look down, I feel reality.

I think I'm lonely.
I think I'm needing help.

Am I asking too much?
Am I expecting too much?
Am I not appreciating enough?
Am I failing to see positively?

Where's the person I could tell the world to?
Does that person exist anymore?

I think I've allowed something very important crack open.
I'll take some time to patch up again.

Wa, it's starting to sound emo again. Damn!
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A big part of mine, but a small part of yours.
It's time to balance up.

2007-11-04T23:23:00.000+08:00

what's going on?

2007-10-27T21:55:00.000+08:00

The past few times I came to this browser page (the one which i'm currently typing on), I came full of wants to say many many things. However I always end up not typing my thoughts out, due to many many reasons. Ironically, one of them is because it's non- excludable, and everyone can read it. Hmm.

I've had this constant thought in my mind, that I was losing my past self. My past self being one who was more cheerful, more carefree in nature, able to just laugh without thinking too much about what the world thinks of me. Sadly, to me, this has died down quite a bit.

I've come to conclude that probably, one of the fundamental reasons why it turned out like that is because of well, liking a person. Maybe it's just me, because usually, though that may be an overstatement, things turn out right. Even if they don't, they don't - totally. Unfortunately or fortunately, for me, I'm stuck halfway. It really does suck actually. Sitting on the fence hurts.

Literally and metaphorically.

I used to think in that past that it would be really good to still be able to remain friends even after a certain ask and answer moment happened. But i guess, as much as I'd like that to be possible, it doesn't come easily.

'It's just like that' - that's the answer I thought I was given. Maybe because I'm ignorant of many things, but with whatever little knowledge I have, that's the answer I gave to myself. It's not exactly the best of answers to have. I mean, there's no reasoning behind it, as far as I'm concerned. I think it's worst than telling a secondary 2 student that differenciating ln f(x) = 1/f(x) * f'(x). It seems like a straight road, with all the traffic lights on green, but hidden behind the second last one, a red one appears.

Then it doesn't stop there. It's because of this kind of a situation that leaves me hanging on. Hanging on to what? A self-induced futile attempt of thinking that something may happen, masked by the cover of 'Because I'm still a good friend'. Yeah, right. More like 'fat hope'. The stupid thing is, I'm still hanging on.

Hanging on is NOT easy, even though it doesn't take much intelligence because only fools do it so well. It's not easy because while hanging on, other negative things starts to poison the mind. 'Beware of jealousy, it is the green-eyed monster'. Lit students, I think you should get the drift. I try hard not to fall victim to it, but yes, most of the time, I am only so strong.

Someone please come along and cut my arms or the rope please.

I think I may be happier after that.

Question: 'Can a guy and girl be very close friends, and remain just as friends?'
MY answer: 'Not a chance, somehow, sometime, one will fall for the other.'

Screw this shit. Return me to myself.

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NOT due to stress of ODAC

the depressions.

2007-10-16T22:58:00.000+08:00

Depressing

Deeperpressing

Deepestpressing

What's wrong?

It's not over till it's over.

If given the chance, grab it!

If not, then stay in touch?

What's with 'I don't want to...'

So you'd leave us, after saying how much we mean to you?

That's unfair.

I can't imagine how it'll be like in 2008.

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Irritating

Reirritating

Re-reirritating

Emotional fluctuations.

Not seeing is better.

I wish I were blind.

It'll be less hurtful that way.

Talk, talk more.

Laugh, laugh more.

Stab, hurt more.

What the hell's wrong?

Too nice?

Too non-selfish?

Sometimes things are just like that?

I don't understand.

Someone answer me.
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Purpose

Purposely

Purposeless

I'm loosing the drive.

I can't do it by myself.

One person can do peanuts.

Can you take more initiatives?

Help me out here.

I don't want to be the only one.

Scared.

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This sucks.

What the hell's wrong.

Chill.

Nitez.

A little update.

2007-10-08T22:58:00.000+08:00

Ah, promos finally over! I'm leaving it to You to help me now, I'm bounded by time and space and can't change what's done. But You're different, so... please give me what seems fit?
Anyways, ho would've thought that even during the course of exams, so much could happen other than studying?

If memory serves me right, I played more frisbee during this exam period than anytime throughout the whole year. I think, it was beautiful how we sort of slickly came together to form two distinct teams that had members who could work well with each other almost naturally. So currently our teams to take part in the SMU untimate are:

Piak! :
Eugene Tan, Kannan, Ivan, Shi Yu, Alston, Karjun, Andrew, Agatha, Nicole and myself.
Shwuang!:
Daniel, Eugene Lim, Hong Zhou, Hong Taa, Joel, Marcus, Shu Xian, Samantha. (did i leave out anyone?)

Seniors and track team are taking part too, it's gonna be tough, but i guess we'll just try our best, and most importantly have fun!

It was also throughout this few weeks in preparations of exams that I spent so much on arcade since the last time i chionged it with Timothy. I was always afraid to try ghost squad in the past, cos i saw how pro those who were playing seemed to be. But woo~, it's really fun and by far the best shooting game i've played. Maybe that's why we spent to much eh? Daytona's yet another game that we spammed playing. Gosh, i think it's close to an addiction. Daniel, Hong Zhou, control arh! Cos I don't want to be the cause for us spending the money we should be saving on for XP on arcade and find ourselves broke after that.

Hmm... i think, i've been a bad influence in a few ways, one of them being this. =(

Well, it's post promos period now. ODAC's started, training's gonna get tough, planning's gonna get scrutinized, Mr Lim's gonna make things difficult. But i guess, it's something we have to do, even though we may not like it.

Because we have a reputation to uphold, competitions to defend, juniors to lead and a hell of a journey to forge for our memory.

Go CJC ODAC batch 10!

P.S: Thank you Dorville for the letter for us. I haven't let everyone read it yet, but i don't want to make photocopies of it, cos i rather they read it from the original, like, so they might feel what you put into it while typing.
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2007-08-30T00:16:00.000+08:00

We did 107 grandstands today, 25 with logs. MMMmmMmmmm.

Shaun asked me while I was doing them, 'Like that fun meh?'. Well.. of course doing the grandstands weren't fun la! But doing them with the people was fun.

Superman of the day: Hong Taa
Reason: Completed 10km in 45 mins in the morning, and did 107 grandstands during training.
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Like the breeze against your skin - See nothing, but feel something.

2007-08-27T21:42:00.003+08:00

I always believed that I have just so much capacity within me. For example, in the past, when i study for my science, my math marks will drop. If i study for math, my science marks will drop. It seems as though i have this certain number of marks that's allocated for me, and no matter how i try, i can't seem to add on to it.

But I've come to realize that this thinking is flawed. Fatally. If it were true, then how come Agung could have 30 hours a day before a certain incident hampered his miracle? How can all those super successful people who excel both in sports and academics and whatnot cope?

I was reflecting on the way back home from school just now, don't ask me why. Maybe it was after reading Mr. Lim's msg. There were so many activities that I wanted to do, but required so much effort in balancing studies with cca. Volcano, night cycling, overseas run, even set up a blog for odac batch-x. They're really things that i would never be able to do again, with the same group of people once the opportunity passes.

Thinking about these, I thought, what if i really did fail promos, and had to retain of got kicked out. I'd lose all these chances that were once there. I'd lose the chance to be with this group of friends whom i've come to treasure dearly within the past eight months. I'd see them carrying on with their activities next year while i remain stuck in JC1, in another cca. It's probably cause an unbearable amount of pain, because my heart will probably stick with odac, while i'm physically commited to another. It's really hurt to think that I'd miss November XP, miss climbing the volcano, miss march xp next year, miss Tioman, miss royal rumble with JC1s, miss night hike to see fireflies, heck i'd even miss berjaya hotel!

Yes, there're things i don't thoroughly enjoy in odac. Probably running so much till I'm afraid of running (Yes, since clearing lvl-0, i have this fear of not being able to clear it again, and that adds stress). Certain aspects of knowledge that are nice to know, but not nice to study for.

BUT, rather than seeing it as a obligation that I've to drag myself to accomplish, I'm trying to look deeper, to see that, not everything in the world would go my way. In the future, there's bound to be things we don't want to do, but have to do anyways, and unlike now, we don't have a choice next time. I'd probably treat it as preparation for the shitload of shit to come in the adult world. Just like how I joined odac with one of the reasons being to prepare physically for army. Hoho.

So you know what? It all comes down to being disciplined to do what's important, and to balance out what needs to be done, as well as to being focus while doing that particular task. It's not easy, but it's no harm trying.

And i've concluded a weird theory.

2007-08-27T21:42:00.001+08:00

2007-08-26T22:04:00.000+08:00

22-08-07
First time donating blood. =)

2007-08-21T22:34:00.000+08:00

Last time I ran was wednesday's training.

Pulled calf muscle, strained both quads.

Friday immobile.

Weekend gluttoned.

Monday Frisbeed

Today failed lvl - 0 by 6 secs.

Waaaaaa.

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Tomorrow's batch time, three straight hours. Hope it'll be great at the end.

Cracks will be mentioned, glue will hopefully be provided.

At the end of it all, I'm just hoping we all benefit, no matter how small it is.

2007-08-20T22:02:00.000+08:00

Prashan:

Level - 4 Completed.
1 sec ahead of time.
10th attempt
10th batch + Fang Hui + Ruben.
20-07-2008.

2007-08-20T21:20:00.000+08:00

Time is ever-present.

It's a gift to each and everyone of us.

Whether or not we choose to use this gift, is entirely up to us.

Sadly I'm not using it well.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Some things need not be mentioned.

They can be understood without words.

Yet, sometimes if left unsaid, would deepen an unspoken rift.

Confusing? Not if you truly understand what's going on.

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[I doubt you'd want to read this so just scroll down..]

2007-08-19T20:50:00.000+08:00

Roderick Chen

ODAC March XP Reflection

During the March holidays, we went for our first expedition! It was a challenging journey with clear objectives. For us J1s, our objective was to absorb as much as we could from this first and last expedition together with our senior batch, and also to endure and enjoy the trip. Personally, it was my first time going for an expedition, and looking back on it now, it was worth every drop of sweat and effort invested.

This March expedition has, on the whole, summed up all that I had did in ODAC for the first three months. It tied together all the things we learnt and put them to use during the expedition.

I remember one of the very first things Gareth mentioned to us were the ‘I’s’ of ODAC.

The SIX “I”s: Interest – You have to have a very strong interest in ODAC, to learn as much as you can and always being curious to learn more. Involve – After being interested, you have to get involved with the activities that are going on in ODAC. Improve – Each training or run or whatever should be made better than the previous one, to better your best. Initiative – You should take the initiative to help make ODAC a better CCA for both yourself and your friends. Also be pro active in influencing positive attitude to your peers. Mr. Lim added another ‘I’, Invest – The more you invest into ODAC, the more you will gain from it. If you commit wholeheartedly and always give off your best in ODAC, these two years could be the best two years of your life.

There was also C.P.F: Commitment, Positive Attitude, and Fitness. These three qualities, I feel, form the core requirements of being in ODAC.

Commitment: This, to me, is the most fundamental thing that we should possess. We all know that ODAC demands much of one and we must be prepared to devote both time and effort to ODAC. That is why we (all the members in J1) constantly remind each other to turn up for trainings and focus on forming close bonds so we remain tight and feel a sense of belonging to ODAC. This contributes to us wanting to come for ODAC trainings and remain in this family despite how tough and stressful it can be. So far, I feel that we have made a lot of progress since we first came together as CJC ODAC batch 10, and we still have a long way to go together.

Positive attitude: ODAC is not only physically demanding, but demanding on other aspects such as mentally, emotionally, socially, and spiritually as well. (Five factors of health!). To pull through we must always have a very enthusiastic mindset, one that is undaunted by circumstances.

Fitness: This is a definite requirement. We are ODAC, Outdoor Adventure Club. How can we contest the greatness of the outdoors if we were not fit enough? We would break and fall even before we could begin learning about nature and the many lessons it has to teach us. That is why we train hard every training, to prepare ourselves for what we ultimately go for, Expedition.

Before joining ODAC, I was ignorant of the many aspects of ODAC other than the physical part of trainings. Little did I know that there were knowledge, first aid, ropes, xp lessons! Maybe I should have expected them since we DID have to learn skills in order to actually go for expeditions, but what ODAC taught was really unexpected. However, I am really glad that these lessons are actually part of ODAC, because I know that I have gained a lot, and I emphasize, A LOT from these lessons. Yet, what we have learnt so far are just the tip of the iceberg. Just as our seniors put it, what they are teaching us are just what they have been taught. The only way to confirm what they say are correct, as well as gain more in depth information is to do our own research, to have a curious attitude and teachable spirit.

Going for this expedition has put much of what we have learnt in the lessons to practice. For example, for astrology, how we could clearly spot orion and scorpious, crux, alpha century and the big dipper. Taxonomy, how we identified organisms, especially those that we saw and felt, for example, from the Einchinodermata phylum, sea cucumber! First aid, how we could treat our own blisters and keep our feet dry and stuff like that. Backpacks, how to properly pack our bags, heavy stuff near to the body, lighter ones on the top and the essentials always accessible. What shoes to wear, what to do when we loose visual contact, what the whistle was for, how to cook and operate the gas stove, following ration pack instructions and pitching our tents. Indeed, even before the expedition started officially, we have already been learning. I also learnt the many responsibilities of the logistics department in expeditions.

Being in the logistics department:

Keeping personal weight to a minimum, why? So that we can help other people carry their things if they ever require our help. Main items that the log team should have and know about: Shit spade – so we can properly cover up places in which we defecate. Gas stove and canister – how to handle them properly. Ropes – to help in obstacles such as rock faces or crossing rivers. Red white tapes – the purposes of it: To direct us in the right direction, i.e. at a fork, an area with multiple paths. As a psychological motivation, as we descend, we see the numbers on the tape decreasing, telling us we’re getting nearer and nearer to the foot of the mountain/ checkpoint. Also we learn the reason of why we need to remove ALL tapes before leaving the mountain. Tents – the different types of tent that ODAC has. Igloo and summer. It is also in this briefing given by Algae that I learnt that logistics seem to do more than what they are required to do. These responsibilities can be summarized in eight points.

1) We look after the welfare of the family – to always keep an eye out for members who aren’t feeling well/ exhausted and offer our help i.e. carrying bags/ assisting in climbing/ providing water.

2) Problem solvers – at any point of time a problem arises, log team are supposed to be quick in thinking to resolve the problem.

3) Advance party – sent ahead of the main group to settle any obstacles such as rock faces and river crossing. This requires quick thinking and fitness as well.

4) Time keepers – to have a good sense of the time, so we would not be lagging too much (as far as we can help it).

5) To tie tapes – the purpose, as stated above, is to we do not get lost, as well as serves as a motivation.

6) To pick up rubbish on the way down the mountains and make sure we do not pollute the mountain. The mountain has been kind enough to let us climb and learn from it, why should we pollute it? ‘Take only memories, leave only footprints’.

7) To help carry everything – Everything that others aren’t able to carry. Exhausted/ girls/ anyone who requires help in carrying their extra load, we will help.

8) Cooks! – Might be required to cook and pitch tents before the main party arrives if we’re behind schedule. There are some extra things that loggers have to carry – extra poncho groundsheet, water. These items, especially the poncho and groundsheet, are multipurpose, as proven by how they could be used as shelter to shelter our flame from rain while cooking.

Coming to the expedition, it certainly taught me a lot. Hopefully I would be able to recall most of the lessons that I have learnt during this journey.

One of the first significant things I learnt is that our seniors are not much different from us when it comes to having fun! The first incident where I realized this was at the train station, when were all gathered in our groups waiting for the train. My group sat down, and started playing games that were totally new to me. I remember how Larissa was a little high, probably from competition, and she was totally into playing the games. “tiu-tiu”, “concentration” “wu ling da hui” and some other games that I totally have no name to designate to were played. I also clearly remember Poh Chiat wearing his hot shorts, shamelessly thrusting his hips to his best effort while playing kaching. That dealt a killer blow to my stomach. It was probably then when I thought to myself, ‘Hey, the seniors are damn fun la!’. Royal rumble also portrayed a very different side of the seniors that I’ve never saw before. The way we all acted like kids on the pontoon pushing, shafting, grabbing even. It was a great experience.

Next! Cheering is VERY VERY important. Who ever thought that simple phrases such as ‘GO ODAC!’ ‘加油！！！’ ‘Don’t give up!’ ‘All the way!’ could go such a long way. I think, during this 5 days, individually, I’ve shouted an array of such phrases no less than 300 times. There were many times while climbing the mountain that I felt that my legs would just stop and give way. But just as I was feeling that way, an encouragement would spring out from either the back of front of the whole ODAC, and my legs just started to move, ignoring the pain and strain. Ophir was definitely a long hike up, with very varying terrains. It was mostly at those which required us to use all four limbs to pull ourselves up where the encouragements really started to make an impact. Also, when we were starting to get weary after two to three hours of climbing, the cheering was deeply appreciated and felt by all, I’m sure. I also experienced, what was called the ‘Salvation Song’. “很高兴见到你。。。　我们欢迎你。。’ How sweet this song felt on the mountains! Just as you thought you would rather just turn back and head down, the melody of this song flows into your ears and you rush for the top, all pain disappearing momentarily. Personally, I felt the cheers really helping me while climbling Datok and Lambak. Datok was a mostly steep climb upwards, and I distinctively remembering how my thighs were burning with lactic acid. Somehow, I was feeling a lot more tired on Datok than on Ophir.

After reaching the only checkpoint and setting off for the summit, I had to stop to take breathers at times. During those moments where I thought, ‘dang, can’t I go on anymore?’ the encouragements that came along spurred me to push on. It was with these continuous cheers that I managed to reach the summit, of course not forgetting the salvation song near the top, which really really made me rush all the way up, to be greeted by over 80 kids? Heh. On lambak, where we were all tired and sleepy from spending about three hours on the summit of Datok, Chu hui’s cheering was extremely helpful. Maybe it was because she was in the group behind mine that I could distinctively hear her voice, but her words we were ascending Lambak were really motivational. ‘Every step you take, every drop of rainwater that hits you, tells you that you’re getting nearer’ or something along those lines, was what kept me going. While climbing, I was deeply reflecting on those words, especially ‘every step that you take’. It was so true. Each small step, no matter how small, takes you that much closer to the goal of the climb.

Apart from cheering generally for the group, I also felt that cheering for individuals were also very effective, well, for me it felt effective. Like, how when someone cheers for you and specially for you, you feel very inspired and motivated to not let that person down, sometimes even returning the favour of cheering him or her back. Drawing magic from your teammates, I guess this could be one example of this theory. I also learnt that coming up with brainless and ridiculous cheers or songs are really effective methods of cheering too. They work a lot better than structured cheers like ‘1,2,3,3,2,1 ODAC ODAC number 1!”. For example, we relied so much on ‘Boom Boom Boom Boom’ to make it through the hike back to our chalet from Juara. Cheering was probably what allowed us to help each other help ourselves. It’s what I call synergy – one of steven covey’s seven habits of highly effective people. It states that when two or more people work together, their combined efforts produce results that aren’t proportional to the number. To simplify things, it’s basically a case where one + one does NOT give you two, but instead, three or more. It really did boost our morale.

This brings me to my next point. MORALE. I learnt that keeping the morale of the family was substantial as it was what kept us all pushing on even when we thought we could not anymore. The importance of having a high morale cannot be stressed enough. For example, when all seemed lost and dark (during our night hike down ophir where the group got split up and we went the wrong direction), morale was low and efficiency in descending was slowed. But if it were reversed, for example, our ascend up Lambak where we were all spurred on by the thought of it being the last mountain to climb, with food awaiting us at the descend and tioman not too far off, we sped up in a whooping 33mins! (the last time I climbed it took around close to an hour). From the expedition, I also gathered a couple of methods to raise a group’s morale. One of them is cheering, as stated above. The other method, which I didn’t think would really have an impact, was motivational food! Initially, I didn’t think that having a sweet in your mouth or not during a climb such as this would have a great impact on your morale, but to my amazement it did. Maybe it was not really the act of eating and chewing down that certain gummy or chocolate that created this mysterious morale lifting effect, but rather the act of sharing of the motivational food between the members. Having a friend offer you a sweet or some small snack never fails to make you feel appreciated. When this happens, you realize that there’s always someone there supporting you, caring for you, and you feel good about yourself. Now, when everyone in the family feels good and happy, the expedition becomes more fun and enjoyable. Entertainment night and song sessions were also very effective in reviving morale. Laughter is really the best medicine in situations like that, and being able to generate laughter in the darkest of hours where everyone just wants to mind their own business is a gift. That’s why despite some mindless remarks by Daniel and Shiyu, they somehow have contributed to sustaining the overall morale of at least, a group of J1s. Also, Marcus’ and Hong Taa’s dual lameness added colour and vibrancy to the very long and monotonous 3.5 hour hike and throughout the expedition too.

Planning ahead, as Mr. Lim emphasized, is very important. Sometimes we have to plan a day ahead, sometimes a week, a month, even a year. I understood what he meant when he made me realize my lack of planning at one of the trainings when I volunteered to be leader. And for the expedition, I tried to plan ahead for whatever I could. Together with Serenella, Poh Chiat and Yi Liang, we tried to map out our entire schedule and checkpoints and strategies to keep on time, with the group’s morale being sustained. However we were to learn that sometimes, no planning is sufficient to predict what screw-ups there would be during xp. We experienced that quite a lot during this March expedition. No matter how we prepare ourselves, there are always factors that are outside our control. Factors such as the weather. Who would’ve thought that it would rain the moment we reached base camp on Ophir and had to set up our tents while raindrops were falling from the sky? Who ever thought that there would be a huge group of kids climbing the same mountain that we were climbing and clogging up the summit resulting in a three hour lag on our schedule? Same goes for how stove heads conveniently decided not to work and give problems to the log head, and how we have to take different routes up and down the summit, almost resulting in the log team having to split up from the main group to remove tapes along the way, if not for Mr. Wong who was kind enough to remove them for us on his way down. Similarly, even with some leeway in the schedule, we can never expect when Mr Lim would like to educate us abit on nature or give comments on our performances. Mr Lim is soooooo unpredictable. Haha. But most of the times, comments and feedbacks from him are very constructive and they serve to help whoever is in charge. Personally, when I was xp leader of the day, the ‘pressure moments’ that he put in me helped me realize the loopholes in planning or observation that I was not aware of. From there, with the help of Poh Chiat, I redirected myself and corrected whatever mistakes could have corrected.

Passing on of messages. One of the most basic things that ODACers are required to know and do efficiently. Countless times on the mountains have we passed messages down. Simple ones such as ‘overhead’ and ‘thorns on the right’ served to keep many out of harm’s way. Imagine being too preoccupied climbing up a steep terrain without knowing there is a branch sticking out at the top and hitting your head against it. Ouch. However, there were times when we did not effectively pass down the messages. An example (probably the only significant one) was at Ophir, when there was a message to turn back. Being the leader that day and having the guide in front of me, I was puzzled at why there was a message to turn back. Mr. James Tan and myself shouted back ‘Who said to turn back?’, but instead of getting a reply, the message, ‘Just turn back!’ arrived. Thus, without a choice, I went back, only to find out that it was a mistake. Perhaps, this time, the consequence was small, but we should learn from this experience to prevent a more disastrous one from happening in the future.

Visual contact. This MUST be stressed upon. Especially with the two night descends that we had to make during this March expedition. But first things first, the first incident that required us to use our torches was in the morning of the day two, when we were supposed to ascend and descend Ophir. Initially, we didn’t not work together to help each other with the torchlight shining and footings, but slowly we became more efficient and leant how to use the footings of the person in front of us to move more quickly. Even so, during the night descend, we encountered several problems. The most obvious of them all was that the sky was dark and we could hardly see what or where we were stepping. The more serious problem came when the group lost visual contact and broke into two. I was horrified the moment I heard that and called them to gather and wait for the second group to catch up. I believed that we should always stick together as a group, to prevent the possibility of either group getting lost. Having a bigger group would also be more effective when cheering, especially when it was dark, everyone was wet and hungry. The next problem came when the whistle was blown. To the J1s, it was the first time the whistle was blown, and I think a lot of us didn’t know know exactly what to do. Passing of messages during this time was also inefficient. A lot of us were questioning who blew the whistle instead of focusing on passing on the important messages. It was then we learnt that we had taken a wrong route, and also what to do when a whistle is blown. That the front man was supposed to run back up and find out who blew the whistle and why and then act accordingly.

Mountain Climbing skills: Surely after climbing three mountains, my footwork and climbing skills have improved alittle. I felt that descending datok and lambak were easier than Ophir, probably because we were getting used to the feel of uneven ground beneath our feet as we stepped/leaped off the edges on minicliffs. Also, torchlights. I learnt that by helping each other shine the torches while climbing in the dark really makes a difference and helps speed up the pace, especially during descends. It makes sense for the trail person to follow the footsteps of the person infront of him or her, just like how we camp at campsites previously used by other campers.

Plants! During this expedition, I was taught a total of 7 new plants. (Spellings are most probably inaccurate) Shorea – at the ranger station on Ophir, sphagment moss, seleginella, white moss, clydimia, dipturuscongugarta, mytoniapectenella, Alstonia, . Of course there were many other interesting plants that I came across on the mountains, but without a camera at hand, I could only gaze at them for a split moment before continuing the climb.

The Malay Language! (or rather a couple of malay words). Since we were in Malaysia, it would have been a shame on us if we did not pick up some malay! Kolam : pool. Anak: Small. Gajah: elephant. Tanah: Soil/ earth. Kuning: Yellow. Kegarisan : To the line (don’t ask me what relevance this has, it was just mentioned and I picked it up). Keblakan: behind. Merah: red. Sungei: River. Panas: Hot. Air: Water. Tandas: Toilet Puku: time. Sampai: Arrive.

We also learnt a little on corals. Honeslty after royal rumble and the sinful meal of a ramley burger, I was on the verge of sleep deprivation. To confessed, I slept about half an hour outside the coral museum when I was supposed to be noting down facts about corals and organisms that live near them. But as hard as I tried, I could not jot down notes without having my pen slip off my note book. However, from what I saw and was able to remember, Corals are ANIMALS. Some corals that I saw while snorkeling were the brain coral (brain-like corals) staghorn coral (they look like deer horns) and vase corals.

We also had a lesson on cosmology which sadly, I could not keep awake for. Just like how when I was copying down notes for corals, likewise happened in cosmology. What I DO remember Mr. Lim saying was ‘we are all made from rubbish’ and how something burned itself out leaving iron and the supernova happened. I promised myself that I would borrow notes from seren who miraculously stayed awake for the whole talk to patch up whatever information I had lost.

Debriefs. I have come to realize how important debriefs are. IT is during debriefs that we get insights on how our members are feeling, what opinions they have. It’s an important period of time specially taken aside form the busy and tight schedule to slow things down and re-gather all that we’ve been through. I learnt several key issues during debriefs, especially those that came from the seniors. One that stuck me was Larissa’s comment on how we should be close but not closed. That we should be close as a batch, and not closed in cliques. I think the J1s felt that deeply and since then we have started working to bond as a whole batch. It is also during the debrief that I came to learn about the small unspoken problems of our family. I find that with these issues being brought up, it actually paves the way to improvement and resolutions of the persisting problem.

J2s who’s actions and words that have impacted me:

Gareth: Being the president, he was able to do his job of giving contructive criticisms to those who he felt were necessary, while at the same time, remaining humble enough to allow the other party feel that what he said was not a personal attack, but an opinion to help improve. As Larissa said, his true strength is not seen on the track, but instead on the mountain where he effectively leads the family. Most notably was on Lambak where gareth led us up all the way, constantly turning back to shout encouragement down on us who were already so tired after climbing two mountains.

Algae: What I respect about algae is his undying willingness to accept any crap that happens to him without complaining. Take for example, when the stove heads messed up, algae almost skipped his dinner to repair and solve the problem for other groups to cook. Also he often gets firing from Mr. Lim, all of which he calmly accepts and works with.

Poh Chiat: I feel that Poh Chiat is a good motivator. His pre-activity prep talks are very focused to help others focus. Similarly, he comes under firing by Mr. Lim, but also talkes it within his stride, to improve on whatever mistake that can be corrected.

Larissa: The overall fittest girl I’ve yet to witness. Larissa was hyper during expedition. She would’ve have easily qualified for a female logistics member. Always taking alternative routes with the logistics guys while providing encouragement to those who are climbing. Composed at all times, Larissa, to me, has done very good job as v-p.

Nicole D.: Besides undertaking the heavy responsibility of tending to all more serious injuries and having to run up and down, Nicole was most of the time, mixing around with us, sharing jokes, laughing, and enjoying the moment together. Yet, she never forgets her duty and springs right into action when she’s needed. Just like how when hong taa got stung. Having such a medical history behind her, and still with her now, she really is one hell of a person.

Elizebeth: First I saw her with one bandaged ankle, then the next day, two. I was thinking to myself, how can a person with two injured ankles be climbling mountains!? But she did it anyway, and I was really really impressed. Mr. Lim’s Cannot also must can because cannot also must can theory.

RABBIT: So small a girl, yet so strong a body. I’m still amazed at how a young girl like her could have climbed so many mountains. She even managed to stay up for cosmology talk while majority (including myself) were dozing off at some point or other.

Where have I been this expedition?

1.Marselling MRT

2.Walk to woodlands checkpoint

3.Cross Causeway

4.Johor Bahru train station

5.Take train to Segamat

6.Bus from Segamat: Segamat, jelanteh, sagil

7.Foor of Ophir. (ledang)

8.PRATA

9.Ascend!

10.Ophir’s checkpoints :

Trail head

Kolam Puteri/ Puteri waterfall (pricess pool/princess waterfall)

Ranger Station

Tanah Kuning

Kolam Anak Gajah (Twin falls)

Kolam Gajah (base camp)

Sungi Segi Tiga + KFC

Gua kambing + Rock face

Botak hill

Summit

11. Base camp @ Elephant pool

12. Descend!

13. Reach foot @ about 9?

14. Makan, wash up, debrief sleep outside prata shop. (carpark)

15. Bus from ophir (6:35 – 8:15)

route: highway to Alor Gajah, towards Tampin, then Datok

16. 10:40 – 13:10 waiting and going to summit

17. Get on bus to Lambak, Kluang

18. Reach @ 18:10

19. Teahouse @ 18:30

20. Ascend, reach summit about (7:10)

21. Board bus @ about 20:30

22. Go makan @ Kluang town. 12RM dinner (left about 11pm)

23. reach mersing @ 1:05am

24. LoooooooooOoOooOoooOong debrief (ended around 5:15)

25. Walk to mersing jetty, reach about 6:35

26. Board speedboat @ 7am

27. Reach Tioman (Ait Batang Chalet), Chalet name: Mokar ß spelling er..

28. Marine Park Center (royal rumble)

29. RAMLEY + Musuem.

30. Snorkelling + sea cucumber (monkey bay for snorkeling)

31. Back @ chalet @ 7:30

32. dinner till 9pm

33. talk by mr lim on cosmology (we are all rubbish)

34. zZzzZz…. Till 2am

35. night hike from 2:30 to 5:45

36. Zzzz at Juara till 6:45

37. Wake up, watch sun, cook breakfast

38. listen to mr lim talk on boats and tides

39. walk back, then to Berjaya hotel

40. reach hotel @ 10.30, slack till 11.30

41. walk back to chalet, reach @ 2

42. RAMLEY AGAIN

43. debrief till 15:15

44. @ jetty take pics, sing song

45. Boat came @ 16:30

46. the first stop is @ salang with the massive chalet (after that we fell asleep..)

47. reach mersing @ 6:30, talk till 7pm

48. shop and buy food for 20mins

49. debrief till 9

50. Board bus, come back Singapore

51. Took wrong route, ended up going west before going back to toa Payoh

52. HOME.

How have I grown?

I think, through this expedition, I have grown closer to nature. It is quite impossible to have spent five days in the outdoors without feeling at one bit closer to mother nature and the planet you live on in it’s natural state. Algae also told us to respect the mountains, and with Mr. Lim’s reminder that we should keep quiet while climbing in the dark, it has allowed me to enjoy and absorb some of natures’ greatest tranquility. Also, to be able to see, for the first time, distinct star constellations in the sky. It really gives me a first hand experience of realizing how we are a dot in a dot in a dot…etc.

Endurance: the expedition was about endurance and enjoyment. And I really felt the endurance part. Especially physical endurance while on Ophir in the rain. It was probably the worst freezing session I had in my life. I was too cold to ponder why we were freezing ourselves out in the rain. Yet, what Mr. Lim said made sense. If we are an OUTDOOR adventure club, why should we allow ourselves to be hindered by rain – something that was part of the outdoors?

J1s who went for expedition. I think, through this expedition, all of us learnt more about each other and have grown closer. Before expedition, I did not have the opportunity to really get to know some of them. But more or less, expedition has bonded us closer together. Some interesting things I’ve learnt about my fellow batch mates:

Yang wei: Yang wei was very pro active in settling our group identities before expedition. After some quick discussion with the J2s in our group, we headed off to toa Payoh with the J1s for dinner, and subsequently proceeded to buy our group identities. All settle swiftly without much problems. During expedition I could tell she was really fit on the mountains, she was very independent while climbing. I really respect her capabilities on the mountain. She was my group’s group leader and I felt safe having her be the leader. She held the responsibility well and always made sure that everyone was accounted for, as well as all other administrative stuff that had to be taken care of. Also, her random offerings of motivational food really helped the group!

Chang Yong: Before expedition, I remember asking, ‘Chang Yong? Who’s that?’ Thinking back now, I feel very embarrassed. However that has changed since expedition! Initially, I found Chang Yong very quiet. I always thought she joined ODAC together with Shu xian’s groupie. But it was much later that I found out that was not the case.. She was our food in-chargefor expedition, collecting orders of food for the group, and bringing some awesome foodstuff to expedition: Garlic, Oil, Eggs, Vegetable, and OYSTER SAUCE. That really made our meals A LOT more delicious. Despite falling sick after descending from Ophir, she pressed on to climb the other two mountains. Though there were times that I saw her stuggling and offered to carry her bag for her, she continued to shake off that weariness to continue on. It made carrying her bag for her all worthwhile when we were at each checkpoint. Why? The reason her bag was so heavy was because she carried extra water and food for the group! Towards the end of the expedition, I could tell that fatigue was really getting to her, but I’m proud of her, that she continued on with us no matter how tired she was and completed all the activites.

Bernie: Bernie’s very soft-spoken, as she said so herself. Yet, in her own quiet way, she was very on the ball with her responsibilities. Such as being on the train to segamat, I recall seeing her wide awake on the train, making sure we didn’t miss our stop. Like Chang Yong, she did not stop just because she was feeling discomfort of some sort.

Serenella: Ever since meeting her in secondary two, he enthusiasm and positive attitude has never changed. She’s always the one to break the ice amongst strangers and daring to take the risk in situations. Always the one to encourage others on to the best of her abilities. During the expedition, seniors commented that she didn’t cheer as much when she was down with pain in her knees. I felt that she did try to, and saw her do it sometimes. Despite struggling up the mountains, she did, to a small extent cheer when she could. Probably the reason she could not cheer as often was because she had to devote most of her strength to actually pushing herself up the mountains. She was my co-leader of day 2, and honestly she was working very hard to try to keep up with the main group while running up and down the middle encouraging.

Eirene: I think she was amazing during expedition. Mainly because of how, with a small body like hers, she was able to carry a backpack that seemed larger than herself up half a mountain. I cannot recall a time where she pulled a long face and complained about being tired or whatnot, instead, I always see her going with the flow, not letting up on whatever activity that was going on.

Samantha: Poor girl had diarrhea or some sort of stomach discomfort, possible due to river water. But nonetheless, she too continued on. I recall several occasions asking her how she was feeling and the answer was always negative, yet, with a smile on her face. Could tell she was really battling the discomfort and pushed on for the sake of the whole group.

Shu Xian: Always in the Injured Party, but always cheering from the back, cheering her I.P on. Shu xian always did her best climbing and descending, and even though she was in the I.P, she somehow always manages to get to the checkpoint ahead of us!

Agatha: Aggie can be critical at times, but we all know it’s all in fun’s name. She’s really one of the wonders amongst the girls, well, at least to me. Used to be in Drama, scored 6 points, can play several musical instruments, and is good in running. Simply amazing. Unfortunately she was hampered by her ‘tumour’. Despite that she too, as with many other of the girls, pushed on till she could take no more. It was definitely a pity that she could not continue with us up lambak, but I’m sure there would be a second chance.

Victoria: On her day, Victoria was really on the ball with her duty. Constantly remind us to catch up so we could be on time for the schedule. Victoria, I feel, tries her best to remain humble but being firm at the same time. It’s not an easy thing to do, but to me, I can sense that she is sincere.

Nicole: I still can’t understand how she’s quiet. Hahah. Maybe like Ronald said, she should not stick so much with seren and myself. But from what I know about her, she has always been very positive about everything and though not the fittest of all the girls, would cheer those around her on.

Marcus: Having known Marcus for four years, I can’t say anything more about him. With Hong Taa they’re probably the lame duo until Shiyu and Daniel decided to take over. But yes, serious when it comes down to business and spontaneous when it comes to fun. Marcus is definitely a person I’d feel comfortable to depend on if I need help.

Hong Taa: I’ve also known Hong Taa for four years, and his voice hasn’t changed. Though monotonous, he’s really a funny and nice guy. Like Marcus, he gets the job assigned to him done, and can really be amusing to be around.

Kannan: I met Kannan in sec 3 in the Prefectorial board, and he was one of the new scholars along with alston. Didn’t really get a chance to know him well during secondary school, but JC’s a different story. Classmates for first intake, I was lucky enough to be under Kannan’s leadership. As many seniors have said, Kannan is always ready to learn. He’s always sincere about what he says and does, and I think that is a real gift.

Alston: Didn’t really see much of Alston during expedition for some reason. But when I DID see him, Alston was a great help. Especially with pitching and striking tents. A smart guy with a very useful gift! He’s able to speak and understand malay! We could all learn from him.

David: Before expedition, I didn’t really have the chance/didn’t take the initiative to get to know David. But from expedition, I can tell he’s a really hardworking person. Willing to learn and give off his best, I think he did very well as the first J1 expedition day leader together with Bernie.

Daniel: During the expedition Daniel grew lame, together with shiyu. Of course there are pros and cons to his lameness. On the positive note, it cheers up the group and builds morale, but there are times when what is said either serves no purpose or has a negative effect. Despite having stomach problems on the second day, he pushed on gave off his best.

ShiYu: He can be a very hardworking person if he chooses to. A couple of us have witnessed it. It’s just how we can influence shiyu to choose to be hardworking. Of course his lame comments have it’s good and bad points, but we all want him around as part of the family, and we are trying hard to do so.

Eugene: I remember first meeting Eugene at orientation. Classmates for the first intake, I vividly remember Eugene and myself saying that we would join ODAC and be super enthusiastic about it. Up till now, he hasn’t let that promise down. Little did I know then that Eugene’s reason for joining was both for himself and his brother. During the expedition, he was always positive and just by being himself, brought a very vibrant and uplifting atmosphere to those around him.

To conclude this reflection, I’d like to apologize for the countless grammar and spelling mistakes made throughout this reflection.

My purpose, my drive.

2007-08-19T20:36:00.001+08:00

To: CJC ODAC

In this first month of being in CJC, I have learnt and developed a lot. Apart from learning new topics in academics, and making new friends from orientation as well as class, I have also benefited immensely from ODAC.

I came into CJC with an initial intent on just trying out ODAC. Hearing from seniors about how tough it could be, I wanted to see for myself if I could be up to the mark. Commitment, Positive attitude, and Fitness were the summary of what was required to be in ODAC. For myself, I believe that I am able to fulfill the first two criteria, and will need to work hard to adequately fulfill the third. For what I lack in fitness, I strongly believe that my commitment to the CCA would be sufficient to cover up. If it helps, I am set on staying in CJC (unless Bro. Paul kicks me out) and no matter what my O level results will be.

I have several reasons for wanting to stay in ODAC. One of the most important reasons for me wanting to join ODAC is to improve myself as a person.

I believe that in experiencing the activities that ODAC take part in, I can develop myself in many aspects. The most obvious of these is the physical aspect. Training in ODAC may be tough, but as I like to tell myself, “what can’t kill you makes you stronger”, and I believe that I grow stronger after each training. No matter how strenuous the training may be, I try to give off my best, and if I come short, I only hope to be able to do more the next time after I grow from the current shortcoming. Also, I feel that as I go about training, my mental endurance and strength are toughened as each time a seemingly impossible task is set before me, I am called to fortify myself and do it anyway. In this pushing of limits, I feel that not only have I learnt to become mentally more focused, I also learn to discipline myself, and to enable myself to do more than what I initially think I could.

Another reason for joining ODAC was to learn more about the outdoors and additional skills. I feel that in this first month of ODAC, the first aid course, ropes lesson, as well as the two knowledge lessons have taught me new things that I would not have thought of learning about. For example the six highest mountains in Malaysia, the stars that make up Orion, and even what a sprain or strain is. Yes, seniors who might not necessarily have the proper qualifications to conduct a course may have conducted it, but I feel that it still helped very much in sparking off interest to know more about each section. Also, having the opportunity to climb mountains is undeniably another reason why I wish to be a part of ODAC. ‘An expedition is a challenging journey with clear objectives’, and I know that, like what Ronald said, it’s the experience and learning that we gather from the expeditions and competitions that truly help us to improve.

As Mr. Lim had said, we should not join ODAC just because our friends are joining, and also not just because we think it’s all fun and games and trekking the outdoors. However, I must be honest and say that having close friends whom I have known for quite long being in ODAC is also one of the factors of why I want to remain in this CCA. Looking at the J2s, I admire how bonded they are and how they truly show us that they are a family. I believe and hope that the 10^th batch of ODACers would too, be as closely joint as the J2s in the year to come. Of course I wish to be part of this family too.

I may have sounded very self-centered in the paragraphs above, but let me assure you that I am not. In everything we do, I believe that doing things in a group, together, we can accomplish far more than any individual. ‘Synergy’ is what Steven Covey calls it in his 7 habits of highly effective people, and I am a strong believer of this particular habit. So far in ODAC, I have experienced many situations where the encouragements of the people around me have made a difference in my performance. I too, have tried to motivate the fellow J1s in our activities, especially the recent 40-story climb, where many of us had the thought of quitting halfway running through our minds most of the climb up. In areas where I am weak in, I try my best to help others whom my efforts may create a difference for.

In the end, whether or not I get into ODAC, I feel that the past month has been a great experience. I know that I have benefited from ODAC physically, mentally, as well as socially. I really hope to be able to remain, and being able to remain in ODAC is definitely a privilege. Whatever the decision, my respect for ODAC will always be there, and I will always remember how I was part of this great experience.

Roderick

1T18

2007-08-18T10:35:00.000+08:00

There's nothing quite like it.

This group of friends that I stumbled upon some four years back, I never thought how much they'd mean to me. Obviously we've parted from our ways of 'raping' Deyong in between almost every transition of period, forming our 'sex train' up four levels of stairs, singing the funeral tune and contsant random lameness in both physical and vocal expressions, we are still pretty much intact considering our circumstances.

Right now, I look at this motley crew of friends that I have, and marvel at how they've changed. Comparing them with the 'them' four years ago, there's a very obvious change in some, mostly positive. To cite some examples:

Deyong: Sarcastic Fat Pig turned STILL sacastic but lean machine.
He lost his title as Pig together with more than 20 kgs since entering jc? Amazing. Looks like someone's getting lucky too. We'd find out in due time.

Zhao Loong: Small cute boy turned STILL cute, but successful boyfriend.
'I don't want to get a girlfriend la, so troublesome'. Oh how different it turns out. And thanks to his shifting of house, 206 has an official hang out spot in the busy environment of town. More specifically, beside a certain important figure's house. *cough*

Ivan: White, H*rny H**rless boy turned STILL white but TALL harem head.
H*rny ever since we met, H*rny still when we meet. Used to be my shoulder height, now I literally look up to him when I talk to him. Plus, his Harem is undoubted school. Heh, okay maybe exaggerated, but the idea is there.

That's just SOME of them.

Comparing myself to them, I feel that I've sort of going through this stunned-growth period. Well, both physically and character wise. It seems like, from secondary school till now, all I've been doing is getting myself involved in some demanding commitment and working hard in it. It all seems spontaneous and live-for-the-moment. Though I do have a goal set out in the future, it doesn't seem like what I'm doing now is contributing much to it.

Oh well, at least my friends are doing well. As long as they still exist, as long as our random meetings still happen, and as long as we the fun when we gather is not lost, I know there's somewhere I can turn to.

Guardian Angel

2007-08-16T21:45:00.000+08:00

guardian angel

–noun

1.	an angel believed to protect a particular person, as from danger or error.

2.	a person who looks after or is concerned with the welfare of another.

[Origin: 1625–35]

guardian angel
noun
an angel believed to have special affection for a particular individual [syn: guardian spirit]

WordNet® 3.0, © 2006 by Princeton University.
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How i WASTED my weekend (in academic terms)

2007-07-22T22:07:00.000+08:00

Saturday, woke up at 0348hrs with a friggin cramp in my left, the night before it was the right.
Then... I turned on the computer and stay awake since then.
Was trying to get a game to work on the computer, try try try until morning came.
Packed my bags with F.D.S material, headed on to school to make the stuff.
Oh gosh, how unproductive. Partially cos i didn't have a clear idea of what to make, wanted to experiment.
Laptop = big distraction any where.
Lasted till 1345 then went for PTM.
I didn't die. Why would I. =)
Came home, continued trying the game. Bah. Got the wrong format.
Slept.
Woke up morning 0730. Finally got the game to work. Played.
Went for mass, cat class, home, game. Wow. I'm so dead.

To-do-list:
Physics gravitation tut
Econs Perfect Competition tut
Econs Project (OMG)
Lit poem comparison
ODAC Letter.
====================================================================

I'm not as hardworking as I seem (or maybe i don't even seem so) to be.

Stuff from June till now.

2007-07-14T01:05:00.000+08:00

Finally got back all my results (except lit), I've to say.. I'm quite... unsaddened by them.

Here's why.

GP: 49+ ; E/D
[ '+' because the marker left out one whole page of my essay which I'm hoping will add on to the current score I have]
Chinese: 46; E
[ At least I passed]
Math: 44; S
[ I didn't get an 'U'. For that I'm grateful to God.]
Physics: 51; D
Economics: 58; C
[ Oh how proud am I. After all the correction sessions that we went through and the teacher saying alot did badly, I was really delighted with the score I got.]
Literature: ???
[ I think... it'll be an E?]

My June holidays was booked with events, as usual, for the past few years. This year, it was filled with ODAC related events. First week saw continuous training for three days, where we went walking around macritchie as well as bukit timah. Saw very nice stuffs, learnt much more.

Second week, CJC's Leadership Training Camp. Was voted by ODAC to represent us, so together with Shu Xian and Hong Taa, the three of us attended this camp. It was alot like LLTC in SJI, with ropes course cum high elements. But what was different was the War Games which I thought was the most exciting experience throughout the camp. Basically, my team was on the defending side, guarding our flag from the offensive team. My team consisted of 12 people, and the offensive, 24. Hong Taa and I were the advance guards, and we took out... 13 enemies. How? By lying down by the roadside on a the top of a very advantage granting slope with our enemies trying to climb without getting picked off by our guns.

Oh, and during LTC, i successfully completed 10km in 50 mins, for ATC training. =)

LTC ended on thursday afternoon, and immediately after that in the evening, was our campout!
Tired, yes, sian, yes, want to sleep, yes, however, want to enjoy campout, Yes X infinity. Trek in dark, cook dinner, sing song, pitch tents, cook breakfast, sing more songs, take photo, trek somemore. It was a great experience, camping by the two pierce reservoirs. Heh. That ended around friday evening.

Saturday was rest after one whole week of activities, and Sunday was Adventure Trail Challenge. Run, Kayak, Run, Trail Bike, get sabotaged by ppl, river crossing, run more, tunneling, run more, matrix station, run, finish. Third placing! 4 hr race. Mmmhmm. Satisfaction unparalleled.

Right after that, chiong home with Hong Taa, showered, and chiong to Deyong's house for 206 bbq! By then my voice was half gone, and guess what? Expedition was just two days away. Ate alot of sotong balls, chicken, hotdogs, usual stuff. FISH! Slept, woke up next morning with my voice 3/4 gone. Headed to school to get ration pack and stuff for expedition. Oh, we're in week 3 now by the way.

Tuesday, Expedition starts. It's a pain to blog about expedition now, maybe i'll just upload my xp reflections if i ever get down to doing one. Basically what we did was, Climb Gunung Chamah ( 10th highest mountain in malaysia), Visited Tempurong Cave, went white water rafting, went Lata Kinjang Waterfall, Visited Hotspring, Batu Cave, climbed Lambak, tried to find BIG TREE but failed miserably, and came home. Yup, that was xp in a gist. But there were many many details.

So came home week four Tuesday. Wednesday went school to wash tents and all, my body was physically whacked up, fever, flu and fatigue. Spent Thursday in pain at home from headache, and started studying for Mid years on Friday. Continued on to Saturday and Sunday.

[Oh did I mention I also had other distracting and disturbing and mood twisting, mind consuming, heart wrenching stuff to worry about?]

And Taadaa, Monday were exams. Then ZHUUUUANG ZHUUUAANG ZHUUANG, exams over and happy happy.

So after having to not need to worry about exams, I had more time to.... Think about that stuff I was worrying over. It was seriously.... not a nice thing to go through. I hated alot of things. Thought badly of other people, and above all, ABSOLUTELY HATED MYSELF for having feel that way. I wasn't strong enough to control my emotions from inclining to that direction. There are only a few things that can trouble a school boy right? If exams ended, what else could be the problem? Go figure.

BUT

I'm fine now. Or I'd believe I am, currently. I finally lived up to my own belief and took the path I always thought was better. 'I'd rather regret doing it than regret not doing it'. It turned out... well I guess. So yeah, things are like that for now, on my side.

Went to look for the ODACers after RCIY for a brief moment. Shu Xian don't so emo leh. And Daniel, you weren't helping the situation la. I wonder how many ODACers would actually read my blog. Haha. But erm, I just wanted to say, this has got to be the best CCA I'lll ever be a part of, and I would really like to forge unforgettable memories with all of you. So yeah, really hoping we'd spend a very awesome two years together, while we still have time to meet everyday. =)

Just met Ada after she came back. I'm telling you people, Aussieland has changed her. Physically *cough*, mentally, and behaviorally if such a word exists. GIVE ME MY ADA BACK! Haha. No la, it's nice to see you again Ada! =)

That's all for now World, happy knowing my life. Till next time.

2007-07-12T21:48:00.000+08:00

It felt good. Now I just have to recover.

2007-07-02T21:18:00.000+08:00

It can actually all be much simpler, if i'd stop thinking so much.

A moment in my life.

2007-06-25T00:00:00.000+08:00

If I try to change things back to the way they were, would it be okay? Would there be too much change to revert? Would it be better to just leave things as they are? Wouldn't it be difficult to continue from here? When did things slide to this stage? Did ignorance, pretence or insensitivity surpress feelings that i thought was there? Or is it that in the end, it's just me? Everything a result of what I drew up in my head, when reality looked so much better? I don't know, I really don't. Give me some confirmation please.

What would I do without you guys.
You'd know who you are.
My very special group of friends.

[Insert]

2007-06-23T22:49:00.000+08:00

Start out friends, get to know each other better, have fun with everyone, have fun in the company of one another and no one else, and if happy happy, get together.

BUT. Something was left out.

Start out friends, get to know each other better, have fun with everyone, have fun in the company of one another and no one else, and if happy happy, [insert: ask a question, get an answer], get together.

Something like that la?

and i'm leaving...

2007-06-12T00:00:00.001+08:00

Will be away from 12-19th june. June Expedition. =)

Slogged by butt off for this expedition, so i'm gonna try to enjoy as much as i can.

Hopefully, and i really do mean HOPEFULLY, no one will give up.

well, tmr's the day. i can only pray.

.

2007-05-24T23:00:00.000+08:00

Some things that i don't wish to type here, but still wish to type somewhere. It's findable.

So far...

2007-05-19T20:55:00.000+08:00

Things to do.

Academics : Revise and study for Mid years.

Physics:
SI Units
Measurement
Thermal Physics
Kinematics
Forces
Dynamics
Work, Energy, Power
Circular motion

Math:
Partial Fractions
Binomial Theorem
A.P
G.P
Sigma Notation
MI
Functions
Parabolas, Elipses, Hyperbolas
Graphing Techniques
Transformations
Paramatric Equations
Inequalities

Econs:
Central problems of econs
Demand and Supply
Elasticity of Demand and Supply
Firms

Lit:
Up to Act 2 Scene 2

ODAC:

Logistics - Mend tents, Bible, Log Kit, Fitness, est. 1500 pushups, learn stovehead maintenence, scenario planning, making common sense to instincts.

General - Try to have everyone learn more about each other. Form a solid batch.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Looks easy? *faint*

2007-05-16T00:11:00.000+08:00

Dear God,

Problems are starting to come together. My friends and I are affected. Please help us.

Yours,
Roderick

2007-05-03T22:55:00.000+08:00

I survived the all-tutorial-day again. Basically, I had tutorials for all my subjects today save Project work.

GP wasn't so bad. I felt very affirmed when my teacher said that english of the past and GP are two different things, and that B4 in enligsh didn't mean i couldn't get an A for GP. =D Cheeeeenese. Well, as usual, just listened to laoshi talk about the kewen. Had a mini math test which i totally did not study for, but luckily it was an easy topic on graphic techniques. Then came lit where we did a piece of written work on Othello. Gosh, i don't even know the play well enough to give a summary of the plot and i've to analyze it in-depth? Physics was okay because we discussed discussion questions, and econs... i'm seriously losing my love for economics. Teacher's forever unhappy with us, possibly with valid reasons to, but still, she should try to hide her unhappiness right? The first thing she does is come in and complain about the dustbin in the class.

Well, what I was afraid of today was getting screwed for not completing my work. I didn't know we had to prepare an econs essay which she wanted to go through. (she ended up just writing down the whole format for the first question, which we spent the period copying down). and Lit poem comparison, which i'm supposed to hand in tmr instead but still haven't done.

Tomorrow's Friday, CCA. Woo! Fun Fun.

Mid-years. I'm honestly scared to think of it. How i'm supposed to find time to start revising, while not compromising both CCA and daily work. Comments anyone?

Almost there, just a little more to bear.

Numb, yes, freeze, don't be dumb.

You know what's best, don't blame the rest.

What's to keep, what to share,

that I know, and hope to keep it there.

~206~

2007-05-01T00:33:00.000+08:00

The best of best group of friends.

Met up with dy, zl, javier, ew, and ht for dinner.

Sushi tei. Woo. Bought a sukiyaki (sliced beef strips with hotpot of soup with veggies) meal. Yum yum. At least i didn't get conned like ew. Haha. Twelve bucks for... a almost CD size circumferenced almost flat plate of unagi egg stuff.

Javier's bento box looked very deep, but when i poked my chopsticks in, it only went through about half way. HAH.

Deyong also, spend 10 bucks on 8 sushis?

I think only hong taa zl and myself had quite filling stuff. Poor eng wei was beggin for food at starbucks. Eached forked out money, bought a large ice blended caffe mocha then chit chat till 11 30.

Ah, the good old days of talking cock till late and going home happy.

Messed up.

2007-04-29T23:54:00.000+08:00

Academics are screwed up. Think I got like, UUS or something.

Maintaining old relationships while forging new ones is no easy business. Feel like I'm

not being a good classmate.

Doing work has never been as inefficient as in the past month.

I haven't touched any work for the past weekend,
like the last weekend.

The computer's a distraction I can't get myself away from.

Sleeping in lectures are
becoming a norm.

Doing work in the library
=
might as well sleep.

Logic V.S Emotions, go figure.

Stupid
human
emotions
that
are
such
a
pain
to
resist.

Am I depressed?
Maybe?
But I'm still hanging in there.

Heh.

I'm leaving it to you to strengthen me.